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OT: Anthony Bourdain dead of suicide


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My late 20’s age son suffers from depression.....I was always the suck it up type of person but depression is a serious real thing...The things I could write about it experiencing as a parent would be lengthy but make no mistake it is devastating and Im always wondering when I might get a call I dont want to hear......ugh
My heart goes out to you.
 
And the thing you obsesss over today is forgotten and replaced by a new disaster a few days later.
Amen! What good does allowing ourselves to become depressed over the news do us?
 
Amen! What good does allowing ourselves to become depressed over the news do us?
Well there is depressed and there is DEPRESSED. Clinical depression is a serious thing, however we are in an epidemic situation where people unhappy with their lives run to a mental health professional and get a quick diagnosis of depression (along with medication that alters the chemistry of the brain, pretty severe when it’s not the real issue). These people often will use depression as an excuse for the reasons that caused their own unhappiness in life to begin with. Essentially if you aren’t a very motivated person whose life is unhappy because you don’t want to put effort into it, a psychologist will tell you it’s not you it’s depression, give you permission to not change anything and then mess with your brain by giving you drugs designed to help people who actually suffer from depression.
I’ve seen it happen quite a few times.
 
Well there is depressed and there is DEPRESSED. Clinical depression is a serious thing, however we are in an epidemic situation where people unhappy with their lives run to a mental health professional and get a quick diagnosis of depression (along with medication that alters the chemistry of the brain, pretty severe when it’s not the real issue). These people often will use depression as an excuse for the reasons that caused their own unhappiness in life to begin with. Essentially if you aren’t a very motivated person whose life is unhappy because you don’t want to put effort into it, a psychologist will tell you it’s not you it’s depression, give you permission to not change anything and then mess with your brain by giving you drugs designed to help people who actually suffer from depression.
I’ve seen it happen quite a few times.


That happens far less often than depression and other mental illnesses going untreated. I do agree people get pills quickly in the nation, and it's not difficult to get them from a psychiatrist, so there are some who are enabled by the faux-diagnosis, but it's important to remember that it's way under diagnosed.
 
That happens far less often than depression and other mental illnesses going untreated. I do agree people get pills quickly in the nation, and it's not difficult to get them from a psychiatrist, so there are some who are enabled by the faux-diagnosis, but it's important to remember that it's way under diagnosed.
I’m not saying the quacks who hand out pills are a bigger problem than the undiagnosed and I’m certainly not saying anything critical of those with real depression.
I’m just pointing out that the psychologists (not psychiatrists nearly as much) are actually harming their patients not only by enabling them, and allowing them to blame an affliction they don’t really have but by giving them drugs that ALTER THE CHEMISTRY OF THE BRAIN. Think about that. We have a drug that changes the brain if people with a chemical imbalance so let’s give it to people without a chemical imbalance and see what happens.
I once had a doctor try to give me a drug called Wellbutrin to stop smoking. He described it as “an anti-depressant that didn’t work but they found out people taking it said it was easier to quit smoking”. That doctor should be in jail.
 
No we just hear about it more. Overall crime has been down. It’s just 20 years ago when a psycho shot up a small town in West nowhere, you didn’t hear about it. 24/7 media cycle and all
A popularly simplistic misconception that doesn't hold up under scrutiny. We're talking matters that extend far beyond lesser incidences of crime being over-reported. There is much more going on than can be attributed to media saturation (commercial and social), which is more symptomatic than anything. Society is extremely complex. We have far too much to do, are overwhelmed, stressed and unfocused, we're philosophically unstable/polarized as a people, spiritually unmoored and eat food-like products vs. real food. That's just for starters.
 
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Well there is depressed and there is DEPRESSED. Clinical depression is a serious thing, however we are in an epidemic situation where people unhappy with their lives run to a mental health professional and get a quick diagnosis of depression (along with medication that alters the chemistry of the brain, pretty severe when it’s not the real issue). These people often will use depression as an excuse for the reasons that caused their own unhappiness in life to begin with. Essentially if you aren’t a very motivated person whose life is unhappy because you don’t want to put effort into it, a psychologist will tell you it’s not you it’s depression, give you permission to not change anything and then mess with your brain by giving you drugs designed to help people who actually suffer from depression.
I’ve seen it happen quite a few times.
Another Amen! I’m a prime example. I got sober in ‘89 and 12 years later, I was seeing a psych dr. I ended up on Zoloft for 6 years. I went from 220 lbs to 315 lbs!

Turns out my new job involved working from home and I struggled to deal with the discipline it required due to ADD.

Today I’m on no meds at all, weigh around 205 and am doing well working from home. Life is life and struggling at times is natural and common.

Rigorous Exercise is a much better medication for all that troubles us. Of course I’m not referring to bipolar and other forms of serious mental health conditions.

My new mantra is “just say no” when my doc wants to prescribe most meds. Fortunately, my doc isn’t a fan of medication and was the person that suggested regular excercise
 
A popularly simplistic misconception that doesn't hold up under scrutiny involving matters that extend far beyond lesser incidences of crime being over-reported. There is much more going on than can be attributed to media saturation (commercial and social), which is more symptomatic than anything. Society is extremely complex. We have far too much to do, are overwhelmed, stressed and unfocused, we're philosophically unstable/polarized as a people, spiritually unmoored and eat food-like products vs. real food. That's just for starters.
Which is exactly why I enjoy keeping my life very simple. I make enough money to travel anywhere. But I’m fine taking a week in the white mountains of New Hampshire. I drive a Kia Sorrento and eat out once or twice a week. Family and friends that aren’t into politics or *****ing about everything helps a lot too
 
Another Amen! I’m a prime example. I got sober in ‘89 and 12 years later, I was seeing a psych dr. I ended up on Zoloft for 6 years. I went from 220 lbs to 315 lbs!

Turns out my new job involved working from home and I struggled to deal with the discipline it required due to ADD.

Today I’m on no meds at all, weigh around 205 and am doing well working from home. Life is life and struggling at times is natural and common.

Rigorous Exercise is a much better medication for all that troubles us. Of course I’m not referring to bipolar and other forms of serious mental health conditions.

My new mantra is “just say no” when my doc wants to prescribe most meds. Fortunately, my doc isn’t a fan of medication and was the person that suggested regular excercise

Good for you brother, keep it up.
 
That's the most phucked up part about suffering from depression. If I'm depressed, it's because something bad happened in my life and I feel I can overcome it because I don't suffer from it as a mental health disorder. For those people like Anthony Bourdain and Robin Williams who appear to have life right where they want it, it makes it that much harder to comprehend what brings people to such depths to commit suicide. If any positive can come from it, it's to bring attention to the real struggles of people who fight it everyday of their lives. RIP Anthony Bourdain.
Agree and what you said speaks to my post. Regardless of fame, fortune, etc mental illness is crippling to everyone.

Its really hard to comprehend. My buddy who took his own life. He was diagnosed with severe depression when we were in 7th grade. His parents did the right thing. The didn't make him feel like he was different. He took his meds. Did the therapy. He had a loving family. Dated chicks. Had good friends like me :p that busted his chops like everyone else. He had the best support system you could ask for and it still wasn't enough.
 
Agree and what you said speaks to my post. Regardless of fame, fortune, etc mental illness is crippling to everyone.

Its really hard to comprehend. My buddy who took his own life. He was diagnosed with severe depression when we were in 7th grade. His parents did the right thing. The didn't make him feel like he was different. He took his meds. Did the therapy. He had a loving family. Dated chicks. Had good friends like me :p that busted his chops like everyone else. He had the best support system you could ask for and it still wasn't enough.
Unfortunately, I have had 2 similar friends and have still never fully gotten over it after 20 and 25 years.
 
Good for you brother, keep it up.
It’s much easier to live sober than it is to live the way an alcoholic/addict lives. Ands thanks for the encouragement

And it’s easier to live healthy than to walk around with 100 extra lb’s! I don’t even know how I did it. I wouldn’t get 100 yards if you put 100 pounds on my back now
 
My late 20’s age son suffers from depression.....I was always the suck it up type of person but depression is a serious real thing...The things I could write about it experiencing as a parent would be lengthy but make no mistake it is devastating and Im always wondering when I might get a call I dont want to hear......ugh

As a guy who suffers from depression for years, I just want to offer what I know. I am not judging you in any way.

I suffered from depression sometime when I was 12 and I am 29 now. In last year it JUST dawned on me that my depression was caused by years of child abuse. Child abuse takes forms of physical\verbal abuse and neglect. My situation was all of above. Since then, I read a lot about child abuse. Why takes so long for me to realize it? Because the abused often feel a tremendous shame about the abusing acts and the fact that he/she let it happen to themselves.

I am not SAYING you abused your child. But it hurts nobody to think about his childhood and do some "search". Maybe some form of neglect because you are a suck it up type? Anthony Bourdain was a friend of a good friend. I suspect he too was abused in his childhood.

1. SUCK IT UP never works. What we need is compassion and self-compassion. Always we are our own worst enemy. We can show compassion to complete strangers but never to ourselves. You can read about it and teach yourself and your son. The leading researcher is Kristin Neff.

2.Things can be the way they are without any emotion or judgement. Depression is hard because the patient is both the attacker and the attacked. Self compassion again.

3. If the fear of his potential suicide keeps you up at night, you should let him know. Let him know you care about him ALL THE TIME
you are not judging him at all
you acknowledge his suffering
you validate his rights to express his sadness\angry\suffering
you offer him compassion
 
He could be critical about food and his industry. That did not make him a piece of shxt.

He was in fact a really nice guy. He was a friend of a NYU professor. Bourdain regularly took time off to speak in her classes.
 
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You're projecting. Were you looking in the mirror thinking of yourself when you typed that?
 
Here I am when I was in my 20's...I was very depressed at the time...but I always had a nice hat...

 
Here I am when I was in my 20's...I was very depressed at the time...but I always had a nice hat...

Heh, you're fooling no one. No way that's you. You never wore a tie.
 
I’m not saying the quacks who hand out pills are a bigger problem than the undiagnosed and I’m certainly not saying anything critical of those with real depression.
I’m just pointing out that the psychologists (not psychiatrists nearly as much) are actually harming their patients not only by enabling them, and allowing them to blame an affliction they don’t really have but by giving them drugs that ALTER THE CHEMISTRY OF THE BRAIN. Think about that. We have a drug that changes the brain if people with a chemical imbalance so let’s give it to people without a chemical imbalance and see what happens.
I once had a doctor try to give me a drug called Wellbutrin to stop smoking. He described it as “an anti-depressant that didn’t work but they found out people taking it said it was easier to quit smoking”. That doctor should be in jail.

it's actually the other way around. psychiatrists are medical doctors and are able to prescribe drugs to their patients. psychologists have doctoral degrees and focus primarily on psychotherapy, counseling, behavioral therapy, etc.--they're not allowed to prescribe drugs except in a few states if they've taken extra pharmacology courses.
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