Jets Suck -- 2017 Edition (Official): Countdown to Oblivion

[JetFan79]

Would it be the ultimate blow to Jets fans if the Giants somehow manage to out-tank the Jets and snag the best QB prospect from under their green noses?

This is not funny.

 

[Joker]

no offense, slam but...no, this is not possible because there is no team like the NY Jete. The Jete don't just own "teh suck", they ARE suck...immortalized in infamy forever.

 

[neali]

2. You're badly constipated and can't make it to the drug store.

You have explosive diarrhea, are about to get married, the priest/pastor/JP is late and you are wearing white tails. And the church doesn't have a bathroom.

 

[neali]

This is not funny.

Yeah, it is funny. It's funny that NY is 0-4. It's funny that suck for Luck resulted in a once proud organization devolving into a joke that maybe only Jacoby Brisset can rescue them from. Intentionally sucking is bad karma. I can't imagine what new level of hell will exist for suck for Sam Jete fans. Neither could Dante. The Washington Generals will sneer at future Jete seasons.

 

[DarrylS]

The NY Jets the gift that keeps on giving.. every time I visit this thread, I wind up chuckling to myself and walk away with a smile.

FU Jets fans who have been living in the glory day in SB III... the fans still have their Green "Puff" Jets Coats hanging their closet with a plastic wrapper, just waiting for the day..

 

[slam]

This is not funny.

OK, workshopped it some more. Here's the ultimate Jets nightmare scenario.

Jets accidentally win a few games. They "earn" the #3 pick in the draft. Mac and Bowles earn extensions.

The Giants ride a perfect storm of suck and earn the #1 pick. They draft Darnold and he's awesome.

The Colts get the #2 pick. They feel Luck is OK and trade the pick to the Bills who, as you recall, traded back this spring and has been smartly hoarding picks. They pick Rosen and he's awesome.

The Jets pick the next Ken O'Brien.

The Dolphins, picking in the teens, pick the next Marino.

Every QB taken in 2017 the Jets passed on to take Adams turn out to be pretty good. So do the various offensive skill position players they passed on.

Adams turns out to be a slightly better version of Calvin Pryor. The safety position evolves to be less important to a team than a backup punter.

Brady wins one more Super Bowl and retires, giving way to Jimmy who eventually wins multiple Super Bowls himself. Belichick then signs a Peruvian soccer player, teaches him football, and he goes on to win the Super Bowls with him.

Woody Johnson lives to be 110. Never learns a thing about running a football team.

In summation, the Jets remain the Jets until the day you die.

 

[BradyMoss812]

It's taken awhile, but after watching the Giants, it seems that the Jets might finally have competition for 'the worst team in New York' title...

Ahhh who am I kidding!!! The Jets are the worst!!!

 

[Bill Lee]

Reasons to be a JETE fan;
1. You're on a reality show, and it's either eat a rat or watch a JETE game

2. You're badly constipated and can't make it to the drug store.

3. You're a sado-masochist and the thrill of getting a humiliating kick in the nuts by a woman wearing a karate outfit is diminishing, so its time to become a Jete Fan

 

[Bill Lee]

Yeah, it is funny. It's funny that NY is 0-4. It's funny that suck for Luck resulted in a once proud organization devolving into a joke that maybe only Jacoby Brisset can rescue them from. Intentionally sucking is bad karma. I can't imagine what new level of hell will exist for suck for Sam Jete fans. Neither could Dante. The Washington Generals will sneer at future Jete seasons.

To think, at one point the Green Slime had Hess as owner and Parcells and BB on-board trying to turn things around. Fast forward to the Woody - Blowes - Macca era Jete. If that mental image doesn't cause a constipated person to instantly **** themselves, they're doomed!

 

[Tunescribe]

This is not funny.

Neither are you. Go away.

 

[JetFan79]

Neither are you. Go away.

 

[Tunescribe]

Link: http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2017-new-york-jets-1797496551

So true ...

There’s also a special place in hell for the teams that are like “now we’re tanking” after already being ****ing horrible forever. This is the Jets fourth rebuild of this decade alone, but this time you’re supposed to buy that shoving Josh McCown out there to fumble 60 times in the red zone is all part of some grand, long-term plan.

Never mind that the Jets, more than any team, excel at upping their organization-wide toxicity with every single loss. The Jets have always been a dire team that loses with almost inhuman persistence. But what makes them TRULY special is their remarkable ability to allow those losses to linger and foster ENDLESS, unyielding bitterness…the kind of bitterness that leads to broken jaws, and players openly trashing teammates, and potential prospects (like, say, Sam Darnold!) fleeing before the Jets even have a chance to get on the phone with them.

And the worst part is they can’t even tank right. Every Jets fan KNOWS that they’re going to go into Week 16 with, like, a 3-11 record and then beat the ****ing Chargers and lose the No. 1 draft pick to the Browns. It is preordained. Every Jets fan knows they need to tank this season and is bracing for a terrible record, but Bowles is coaching for his job and will likely be fired if the team does tank, so they’re going to pull off at least two or three meaningless wins and draft fifth or sixth again. You guys miss out on every Peyton Manning, and you always will. Again, ****ed. All so ****ed.

 

[JetFan79]

Link: http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2017-new-york-jets-1797496551

So true ...

There’s also a special place in hell for the teams that are like “now we’re tanking” after already being ****ing horrible forever. This is the Jets fourth rebuild of this decade alone, but this time you’re supposed to buy that shoving Josh McCown out there to fumble 60 times in the red zone is all part of some grand, long-term plan.

Never mind that the Jets, more than any team, excel at upping their organization-wide toxicity with every single loss. The Jets have always been a dire team that loses with almost inhuman persistence. But what makes them TRULY special is their remarkable ability to allow those losses to linger and foster ENDLESS, unyielding bitterness…the kind of bitterness that leads to broken jaws, and players openly trashing teammates, and potential prospects (like, say, Sam Darnold!) fleeing before the Jets even have a chance to get on the phone with them.

And the worst part is they can’t even tank right. Every Jets fan KNOWS that they’re going to go into Week 16 with, like, a 3-11 record and then beat the ****ing Chargers and lose the No. 1 draft pick to the Browns. It is preordained. Every Jets fan knows they need to tank this season and is bracing for a terrible record, but Bowles is coaching for his job and will likely be fired if the team does tank, so they’re going to pull off at least two or three meaningless wins and draft fifth or sixth again. You guys miss out on every Peyton Manning, and you always will. Again, ****ed. All so ****ed.

Did Woody Johnson steal your girlfriend or something back when you two were in high school?

Your dedication to Jete bashing is truly commendable (and entertaining). Just trying to figure your motivation.

 

[IcyPatriot]

I come to this thread daily and without fail the Jets still suck -

 

[IcyPatriot]

 

[IcyPatriot]

 

[IcyPatriot]

 

[Clonamery]

Did Woody Johnson steal your girlfriend or something back when you two were in high school?

Your dedication to Jete bashing is truly commendable (and entertaining). Just trying to figure your motivation.

Look in the mirror asshat.

 

[JetFan79]

Look in the mirror asshat.

 

[They_Hate_We]

Jete alt unis this year.