Re: Patriots sign Rookie Player and he is expected to have immediate results.
appreciate you wasting 30 seconds of my life.
With apologies to Ian and WeezyFbaby, but this pout over B_a_P's artistic fun is too ironic a temptation to resist:
Al Michaels: Born_a_Patriot drops back in the pocket, he's pressured up the middle and is forced to scramble to his left, he's looking upfield...and fires a laser across his body into the middle of the field...
John Madden: **
munch, slurp, burp** ...dangerous pass that one...
Al: ...to WeezyFbaby - Great Jumping Couch Potato! He caught it! WeezyFbaby actually caught the ball! WeezyFbaby stumbles toward the goal line, 20, 15, 10, 5...he's hit from behind by Bob Sanders' walker, Bob is hopping forward on one leg from the 8!
Mad: **
Belch** WeezyFbaby appears to be more disoriented than usual...
Al: ...he's coughed up the ball and appears to be crawling towards it at the goal line. Sanders is one-legging it furiously and is almost on top of him...he scores! WeezyFbaby scores with a surprising effort!
Mad: **
drool, slurp** ...very surprising. He fell on that ball like it was a throw pillow. Notice how he tucked it under his head and snuggled it in with one hand?
Al: ....an amazing effort to cradle the ball under his head right on the goal line before curling up in the fetal position! There's a time out on the field while the trainers tend to Bob Sanders' walker. We'll be right back.
Commercial Break Voice-Over: "Do you get that bunched panties feeling whenever you think of how Bill Belichick kept Matt Cassel on roster despite your curses at the television? Does the thought of Giselle easing Tommy Brady's discomfort on Sunday afternoons give you that wedgie feeling? Are the cushions on your couch feeling more and more like a gridiron? Try Valvoline Penetrating Solution, now with the pry bar nozzle!"
Back to the game:
Al: John that was a dangerous pass thrown by Born_a_Patriot.
Mad: **munch, mumble** It sure was Al, I'd have stepped on the Snake's tail if he'd thrown a pass like that, but his protection broke down immediately and he had to run. He was incredibly lucky WeezyFbaby had his mouth open and was making the scrunchy face.
Al: He sure was.
Mad: **urp!** Look here, you can see WeezyFbaby quit on his route, from the beginning. He was walking aimlessly in the middle of the field poking pins into his Matt Cassel voodoo doll and ranting non-stop. BAM!! The ball wedges itself between his teeth and while he's choking and clutching his throat he inadvertantly stumbles towards the goal line. Bob Sanders' walker made a valient effort and POW!! punched the ball loose before he could cross the line, but fortunately for patsfans.com, WeezyFbaby saw the loose ball as a throw pillow on his mother's couch and curled into it for the touchdown.
Al: That was a wild play. Let's go down to Andrea Mitchell for an update on Bob Sanders' walker, Andrea...
