Alright, alright. That's what I'm talkin' about!
Now everyone give it up for the teams playin' here
The Browns and the Bengals!
A toast to the Browns!
(To the Browns! To the Browns! To the Browns!)
To the Stripes!
(To the Stripes! To the Stripes! To the Stripes!)
Two weak sisters...
Of Baltimore! Of Baltimore! Of Baltimore!
Who always draws you *** off side!
(Drawn off-side! Drawn off-side!)
To New England!
(To the Pats! To the Revolution!)
And the model we provide
(Provide, to provide)
And may you one day
(One day...)
Be Satisfied
Rewind– Rewind–
(...)
Rewind– Rewind–
I remember that year, I just might disappear that year from from all my tapes
I remember Mangina tryin' a make a play, where is he these days?
I remember assistants' names, they're all named Matt
"New kicks, might want a raise"
But I'll be damned if the NFL gets another dime of my pay
League has never been the same
Destroying evidence once New England was FRAMe-d
And camera placement was the name of the game
Set Goodell aflame, Go to hell, so lame
This is not the game
"You strike me as a commish who has never been satisfied."
"I'm sure I don't know what you mean. You forget yourself."
"You're a JETE. You're never satisfied."
"Is that right?"
"You will never be satisfied."
"My name is Goodell, a JETS file clerk."
"William Belichick."
"Where's your ****in neck?"
"Unimportant. There's a million rings I haven't won but
Just you wait, just you wait..."
So so so—
So this is what it feels like to match wits
with JEST beneath your level? What the hell, he's a half-wit!
A feeling of feeble, of open and shut,
it's Mark Sanchez with a lineman's butt! (And Rex's gut)
The inquisition lasted one season, maybe two seasons
Ev'rything the league did for no effin reason
It's a dream and then the big dance
A bit of a poseur in a three point stance. He's a bit of a turnstile, Logan Mank-
-ins. I asked about assignments, did you see his answer?
His hands started fidgeting, he looked askance?
Clueless in the Super Bowl crappin' his pants!
Swim move, boy you got beaten
Spin move, and your lunch got eaten!
I wanna bench him but he's the best we got, then I see Goodell's secret plot, and he is
Ringless
And I know he is
Ringless
All the JEST are just
Ringless
And I realize three fundamental truths at the exact same time
"Where are you taking me?"
"I'm about to change your life."
"Then by all means, lead the way."
Number one!
We're the Pats in a league in which their only chance is to whine like a *****
Tom Brady's always won, so he's the one who who must be eighteen and one
So he's the coldest and the winningest and the bullsh1t in New York City
Is insidious, and Goodell is Lombardiless,
Ha! We don't want the next one any less
Number two!
He's after me cuz I'm a proven winner. That elevates his BP, I's
got an actual franchise
Maybe that is why he's lovin' Matt Estrella, now that's his bride
Nice going, Bill Belichick, Ex-JEST
will never be satisfied
Number three!
I know opponents like I know my own mind
You will never find anyone as good at scheme design
If they suddenly enforce something that wasn't worth a fine
Any other time
You would cry that it's a crime
You'd be lying
But when I fantasize at night it's 19 and 0, surprise
As I romanticize what might have been if they hadn't prized a Giants victory
At least Matt Estrella's all right
At least the league kept parity in sight
To the Browns!
(To the Browns! To the Browns! To the Browns!)
To the Stripes!
(To the Stripes! To the Stripes! To the Stripes!)
From your master
Bill Belichick! Bill Belichick! Bill Belichick!
Check your head and he's inside!
(he's inside! he's inside!)
To New England!
(To the Pats! To the Revolution!)
And the model we provide!
(Provide, to provide)
May you some day
(some day.)
Be Satisfied
(be satisfied, be satisfied. be satisfied)
And I know
For Goodell, this counts as pride
And I know
He will never be satisfied
I will never Be Satisfied
