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What Football Phrase Annoys You The Most?

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Not to be a contrarian, but Gil Santos has some football phrases I grew to love.

"Brady back to pass . . . and he shoots it long and deep for Randy Moss!"

"Handoff to Fred Taylor trying the right side and he's snowed under by a host of Patriots!"

And one he can no longer use ever since the arrival of the flying Elvis is to describe the Pats as "The good guys in the white hats."
 
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Useless statistics, like "the team is 5-0 when (fill in the name of a RB) runs for 150 yards". Really? Has anybody ever lost when a RB runs for that much yardage?

Obvious statements like "the keys to the game are to establish the run, stay away from stupid penalties, and avoid turnovers".

"Time running out on the play clock" when there's still 4 or 5 seconds left.

"Time running out" at the end of the 1st or 3rd quarter, when the time doesn't matter.

"They have to go for 2 now" on an extra point when it's still in the 3rd quarter.
 
"THE Tom Brady's of the world"
"THE Randy moss's of the world"
"THE Peyton Manning's of the world"
"THE Dwight Freeney's of the world"

There are several of each of these players so we need to use the word "the" when talking about them.
 
This season:

Blueprint...
Cheating...
Poked...

 
"World Champion Indianapolis Colts"

That is one of the worst phrases in the history of the human race.

Another annoying phrase: "make a play". Ah, could you be more specific, please? Or is that asking too much?
 
These are more player specific.

Favre: "Gunslinger." When he's throwing it up there with an equal chance for both teams to catch the ball, it's dumb, not exciting and fun.

"He's like a kid out there!" Oh what joy, what pure sweetness of spirit!

Vince Young: "He just knows how to win!" Except not so much this year. You mean playing badly isn't canceled out by the 'winning' gene? Interesting.

And more general ones.

"Costly interception." Wow, no sh*t? Next time I'll throw a profitable one.

"I was talking to Philip/Tom/Peyton." I've noticed this trend recently and it's driving me crazy. Stop referring to players by their first names announcers (I'm looking at you Nantz, Mr. 'Philip mentioned to me...'). They're not your buddies. Stop.
 
"They have a portable offense" - Means you can't throw the ball.
"Is tonight the night?!?!?!" - Tony Kornheiser
 
"IT IS WHAT IT IS"!

The latest catch phrase. This one has just worn on me because "what exactly is what what is"?? I hear so many guys say this, and of course we understand generally what they mean, but give an answer already. Like the Baltimore players explaining away their complete and total crumble in the last few minutes of that game when referring to the penalties and supposed 'bad calls'. Give an answer fellas. Explain without copping out and taking the easy road. "It is what it is". Someone wash it away, please.

Read Paul Grice's "Logic and Conversation."
"It is what it is" LOGICALLY has no content, which I'm guessing is what bothers you. However, CONVERSATIONALLY, it communicates some interesting things.

One rule of conversation is be relevant, another rule of conversation is be appropriate. When those two rules conflict, at least one has got to give.

So, at your grandmother's birthday dinner, one cousin loudly asks another cousin about how he contracted genital warts. The conversation instantly dies. You feel the need to say something, but if you say something relevant, it will surely be inappropriate, so you say, "I can't believe the Pats are undefeated!"

Likewise, a reporter asks a question that invites Belichick to whine about a ruling from the competition committee. Anything relevant that he says will be inappropriate, so Belichick says, you guessed it, "It is what it is."

It does a few other things as well, such as keeping focus on reality as opposed to fantasy. You can come up with explanations for those.
 
Favre: "Gunslinger." When he's throwing it up there with an equal chance for both teams to catch the ball, it's dumb, not exciting and fun.
When Favre throws boneheaded interceptions, he's a gunslinger.

When most other QB's throws boneheaded interceptions, they're idiots.
 
"He went up and caught the ball at its highest point."

No, he didn't. The highest point was like 60 feet in the air about half way to the receiver. That would be one hell of a freaking jump.

There are plenty of ways to say that a guy jumped higher to catch a ball, but "caught it at it's highest point" is just silly.
 
"we're going to war!"....

No, no they are not. Football isn't even close to war, and players who say stuff like that are pretty clueless. Any of them want to see what real war is like, they can visit one of the VA hospitals.
 
"World Champion Indianapolis Colts" Name one other country that plays anywhere close to NFL level (not even Canada). Will there ever be a football World Cup?

And from the players:

"I expect to get paid." "I gotta feed my family too, ya know." "Don't be disrespecting me." (Asante, Shannon, TO)

And the coaches:

"I have a lot of respect for that football team. They're well-coached. They're a very physical football team. We have to win the battle at the line of scrimmage, or it's going to be a long day. We have to take it one game at a time." (sorry, BB)
 
"set the edge"
 
"World Champion Indianapolis Colts" Name one other country that plays anywhere close to NFL level (not even Canada).

England. NFL has gone international. The Dolphins proved they can suck in Europe too.
 
- "As good as anyone in the League" If you're as good as anyone, that means you're probably average. I don't see how that's a compliment.

- "To a man" Never got this expression, never will.
 
"He split the A hole" John Madden

Ouch.

I hate, absolutely hate, the overuse of the phrase "and that was almost intercepted." Everyone and their mothers say it despite the ball just being tipped or a pass deflected high in the air that falls to the ground with damn near no one in sight. It just irks me to no end.

A lot of funny ones in this thread, though. Good topic.
 
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