SANTURDIO IS OUT ON BAIL
Steelers receiver Santurdio is out of jail after posting a $3,500 bond on Monday, according to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. He had been arrested on charges of domestic violence and assault in Columbus, Ohio. (His legal name is "Santonio Holmes," but we're going to refer to him from this point forward as only "Santurdio.")
Santurdio pleaded not guilty to the charges, and his lawyer requested a trial by jury. (The lawyer specifically asked for the jury that acquitted O.J. Simpson, but he was reminded by the judge that those folks live in, you know, California.)
The person Santurdio allegedly assaulted was Lashae Boone, the mother of Santurdio's youngest child. (He's only 22 and he's already got three of them -- he might not ever match Jerry Rice's records, but he's on pace to shatter Shawn Kemp's.)
Based on a police affidavit, the specific claim is that Santurdio did "knowingly cause or attempt to cause physical harm to a family or household member . . . by means of choking, throwing her to the ground, grabbing her arms and slamming her into a door, leaving her with bruises, pain and a torn shirt." (For us, that sentence conjure images of Rain Main writing in his book of major injuries that "Charlie Babbitt grabbed and pulled and hurt my neck in 1988.")
But Santurdio's lawyer apparently disputes the fact that Boone was hurt in the alleged assault. "Nobody's injured," the lawyer said. "There were no injuries." (We feel compelled to make another smart-ass comment in parentheses, but we can't think of anything to say.)
Said Bill Cowher on a radio show on Monday, regarding the incident: "I really don't have any details whatsoever, so I really don't want to comment. It's unfortunate that these types of things are making the news. It's not what you want to be doing at this time of year."