Any tips on consoling a young Pats fan?

[farn]

The only reason winning is fun is because of the possibility you’ll lose. It’s when you realize how common it is to lose, that you truly start to appreciate wining.

 

[TomPatriot]

Tell him there are worse things than losing. Like being a Jets fan.

 

[StockingAnarchyNumber12]

Sbow him this board and tell him he's going to grow up to be like some of the yokels here if he doesn't stop crying

Amazing Post

 

[nabwong]

He's too young for a hooker, so how about a case of good beer and a pack of smokes?

while a bunch of us were hoping for a miracle at the end of the game, did you go see miracle?

 

[primetime]

Do what us 80s/90s kids did, get really into the draft.

 

[nabwong]

I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

So a 9 year old lacks perspective. Words can only do so much. Do you guys support anything else? Such as good causes, charity, women’s rights etc? It’s easier to build resilience in children through non verbal stuff. Kids gotta learn to not have everything all the time.

 

[BTTA]

That’s the thing, I’ve seen him get upset when he strikes out, when he loses at other things but I’ve never seen him get so upset after a loss. The worst part is he has absolutely no control over the Patriots whereas everything else in life he has some relative control to his successes and failures. It’s like he placed his worth, value and identity in a football team.

This is a fantastic parenting opportunity. We develop emotional intelligence throughout our lifetimes, and these "moments of truth" are priceless.

At some point in the next few days, he'll be ready to reflect on what just happened to him, and your point about control is so relevant.

Step One: talk about how the point of sports fandom is to bring pleasure into our lives, and how that's not what just happened to him.

Step Two: Help him realize that he has complete freedom to choose how to relate to the Pats (and other teams) and can choose to regulate and shape his investment there. This is tough for a 9 year old but it isn't too early to start.

Step Three: While he's reflecting, get him involved in something he CAN control, and will find fulfillment in - like making something with you out of wood, or cleaning and upgrading his bicycle, or something like that. When that's done, reflect with him on the contrast between the emotional satisfaction that experience provides, vs. investing that heavily in something he can't control like being a sports fan.

Step Four: Talk about how resentment ("I hate the Patriots!") is a natural first reaction but in the long run is a losing mindset because it gives away control of his happiness.

 

[Give Kraft A Hand]

I mean you could just show him the 1986 world series and the 2003 ALCS...not anything to do with anything except the absolute pure misery the Boston fan base used to go through.

 

[skinnydog]

Sit him down and watch all 6 versions of 3 games to glory. Then see how he feels

 

[PittPatriot]

Do what us 80s/90s kids did, get really into the draft.

I can still remember thinking Tom Hodson was going to be Joe Montana. Yup. I sure did.

 

[chris_in_sunnyvale]

"It's okay to be sad, buddy. Want to go get some ice cream?"

Regards,
Chris

 

[PittPatriot]

@FreeCourtroomBrady
Where do you live? (Trying to get an idea of the fanbase around you). I feel it is much harder being a hardcore fan when you live in another city as you have no “support system” like the locals.
Won I was 9yo, we moved to Pittsburgh from Norwood and I was CRUSHED when the Lakers beat the Celtics that summer.
That winter, the Patriots made their run and I fell in love...but the kids at school crushed me after the Bears beat down (Mike Ditka was from the next town over).
I dealt with misery after the WS in the fall of that year. Kids made fun of me for it even though the Pirates have nothing to do with the Red Sox.
I dealt with Patriots comments for the next decade in grade school.
Losing over and over made it easier to get over losses.
Having REAL life issues also diverts us (health struggles, loss of someone, etc).
In the end, life must be pretty good for a 9yo to be upset over sports.

 

[Triumph]

That’s the thing, I’ve seen him get upset when he strikes out, when he loses at other things but I’ve never seen him get so upset after a loss. The worst part is he has absolutely no control over the Patriots whereas everything else in life he has some relative control to his successes and failures. It’s like he placed his worth, value and identity in a football team.

Show him old youtubes of Patriots heartbreakers.

The Pats might be winners again someday after a likely upcoming dry spell.

 

[PittPatriot]

Another option:
send him to Uncle @Deus Irae for a few days and see him returned a changed lad.

 

[RobertWeathers]

I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

He just needs to get over it. It's a cold suggestion but not sure what else you can do.

I think your advice is solid by saying his favorite team will not win championships every year.

I'd also suggest setting the example on how to behave in front of him. If you become unhinged, so will he.

 

[IcyPatriot]

A kid challenged with adversity will make him stronger.
Parents just need to reinforce that sports is entertainment.
Make sure they see the on field good sportsmanship that exists when the games are over.

 

[woolster22]

Maybe its time to teach him about hypocrisy. Bob Kraft is an excellent example of do gooder elitist prick. Hes the shining example of all that is wrong in this world.

Fires an employee (who if on the team, we're hosting our 1st playoff game next week, and probably talking about 19-0 again) over unsubstantiated allegations in PROBATE court, while fighting the flimsiest of challenges to get VIDEO EVIDENCE of his handy thrown out of court to avoid an embarrassing fine. Like theres plenty of people rolling up to a rug n tug in a Bentley? Sure, the topic matter isn't necessarily great for a 9 year old, but I'm sure you can figure it out.

 

[PatsWSB47]

Tell him how Jets fans cope......tell him "we'll win the off season". If that doesn't work do what the Colts do. Get a banner that says "Wild Card Game Participants"

 

[PatsWSB47]

Maybe its time to teach him about hypocrisy. Bob Kraft is an excellent example of do gooder elitist prick. Hes the shining example of all that is wrong in this world.

Fires an employee (who if on the team, we're hosting our 1st playoff game next week, and probably talking about 19-0 again) over unsubstantiated allegations in PROBATE court, while fighting the flimsiest of challenges to get VIDEO EVIDENCE of his handy thrown out of court to avoid an embarrassing fine. Like theres plenty of people rolling up to a rug n tug in a Bentley? Sure, the topic matter isn't necessarily great for a 9 year old, but I'm sure you can figure it out.

Get off your soap box, You're sollution is selfish and would have no place in helping the kid out.

 

[A Defiant Goose]

Tell the kid it's all downhill from here get used to it lol