OT: RIP Chuck Norris

TheRainMaker said:

I believe Chuck was the first major internet celebrity meme.

The only Chuck Norris movie I cared for as a kid growing up was "Sidekicks". Aside from that, I only watched Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Van Damme and Willis movies.

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jimnance said:

Chuck could kick all of their asses w/o question.
He would have destroyed overrated kickboxer Van Damme

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Patsfan1645 said:

You missed out on some good ones like the Missing In Action trilogy.

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jimnance said:

Chuck could kick all of their asses w/o question.
He would have destroyed overrated kickboxer Van Damme

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TheRainMaker said:

I was a young kid in the 90's and Chuck was known as a D-list-straight to video movies which we avoided. I only knew one kid that actually watched his movies and liked Delta Force. Most of us were watching the other names I listed.

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jimnance said:

I was only referring to real fighting, not movies or acting. Arnold, Stallone and Willis were all better actors than Chuck. No question. But he was,a real life tough guy not a fake movie one. At least he was a better actor than Van Damme which ain't saying much.

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Tunescribe said:

Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.

Every year on his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

Chuck Norris is not dead, he's just taking a long, well-earned nap. Meanwhile, Tedy Bruschi has been nominated to fill in during Chuck's absence.

God wanted 10 days to create the Earth. Tedy Bruschi gave him six.

Tedy Bruschi isn't hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Tedy Bruschi.

Tedy Bruschi lost his virginity before his dad did.

When Tedy Bruschi goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe and instead requests a handgun and a bucket.

I remember one time I was thinking bad thoughts about Tedy Bruschi when suddenly he entered my mind (whether in physical form, or ethereal, I know not) and kicked my brain's ass. When I awakened, I was laying face down, naked in the mud, destroyed and disoriented. The only evidence that remained from the incident was three large ring marks and one small thumb-knuckle indentation across my right cheek. Even though I looked awful and appeared to be shamed, people came from all around the land to lick my sweat in hopes to absorb any Bruschi residue that remained.

Tedy's name is spelled with one D, because the other one gave him attitude so he dropped it with a roundhouse. The other D left to become the 1985 Bears defense.

When Tedy Bruschi had his first wet dream, he nearly drowned.

Tedy Bruschi ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.

When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Tedy Bruschi.

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Gumby said:

Tunes,
With all due respect to Tedy, I didn’t find any of the Chuck-joke posts disrespectful……until yours.

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Tunescribe said:

How so? There is no disrespect intended here -- quite to the contrary. Tall tales of prowess have long been linked to honoring Chuck's legacy. Tedy portrayed as his "stand-in" is a social media thing going back almost 20 years, after he astoundingly came back from a stroke.

Paying homage to these men in the grand tradition of Paul Bunyan is an expression of both love and reverence.

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Tunescribe said:

Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.

Every year on his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

Chuck Norris is not dead, he's just taking a long, well-earned nap. Meanwhile, Tedy Bruschi has been nominated to fill in during Chuck's absence.

God wanted 10 days to create the Earth. Tedy Bruschi gave him six.

Tedy Bruschi isn't hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Tedy Bruschi.

Tedy Bruschi lost his virginity before his dad did.

When Tedy Bruschi goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe and instead requests a handgun and a bucket.

I remember one time I was thinking bad thoughts about Tedy Bruschi when suddenly he entered my mind (whether in physical form, or ethereal, I know not) and kicked my brain's ass. When I awakened, I was laying face down, naked in the mud, destroyed and disoriented. The only evidence that remained from the incident was three large ring marks and one small thumb-knuckle indentation across my right cheek. Even though I looked awful and appeared to be shamed, people came from all around the land to lick my sweat in hopes to absorb any Bruschi residue that remained.

Tedy's name is spelled with one D, because the other one gave him attitude so he dropped it with a roundhouse. The other D left to become the 1985 Bears defense.

When Tedy Bruschi had his first wet dream, he nearly drowned.

Tedy Bruschi ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.

When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Tedy Bruschi.

Click to expand...