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Parody: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

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Ice_Ice_Brady

where black is the color where none is the number
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Please excuse the bad language for the sake of humor.


Belichick: I run my unit how I run my unit. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 scouts who are trained to spy on me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.

Goodell: Sit down. I didn't dismiss you.

Belichick: You see Roger, I can deal with the media, and the Colts, and the commercials. I don't want money, and I don't want medals. What I do want is for you to stand there in that f-ggoty white uniform and with your Harvard mouth extend me some f*cking courtesy. You gotta ask me nicely.

Goodell: Just one more question, before I call Mangini to testify-

Belichick: Son, we play in a league that has signals, and those signals have to be recorded by men with cameras. Whose gonna do it? You? You, spokesperson Aiello? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the Jets, and you curse the Patriots. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That the Jets' loss, while tragic, probably improved ratings. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, wins titles. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that sideline, you need me on that sideline. We use words like taping, playbooks, preparation. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the dynasty that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a camera, and record signals. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Goodell: Did you tape the plays?

Belichick: I did the job-

Goodell: Did you tape the plays?

Belichick: You're godd@mn right I did!

(Belichick fined by the league)

Belichick: [yelling] I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and p-ss in your dead skull! You f*cked with the wrong coach!
 
Last edited:
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

Very nice.
 
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

WOW how original...

The mods really need to start cracking down on folks who just can't grasp simple concepts like OT: My parody transcript of...
 
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

WOW how original...

The mods really need to start cracking down on folks who just can't grasp simple concepts like OT: My parody transcript of...


Just edited the title of the thread.

Instead of the whining inside the thread (where we may or may not see it), next time why not just PM us or report it and we'll be happy to be of service.

Of course, that wouldn't be as cathartic for you.
 
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

Just edited the title of the thread.

Instead of the whining inside the thread (where we may or may not see it), next time why not just PM us or report it and we'll be happy to be of service.

Of course, that wouldn't be as cathartic for you.

Or probably for you either, lately.
 
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

Just edited the title of the thread.

Instead of the whining inside the thread (where we may or may not see it), next time why not just PM us or report it and we'll be happy to be of service.

Of course, that wouldn't be as cathartic for you.

I think I just fell in love with you. HAHAHAHA.
 
Re: Transcript of Belichick/Goodell conversation

I think I just fell in love with you. HAHAHAHA.

I'm flattered, but I'm a married man!
 
Please excuse the bad language for the sake of humor.


Belichick: I run my unit how I run my unit. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 scouts who are trained to spy on me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.

Goodell: Sit down. I didn't dismiss you.

Belichick: You see Roger, I can deal with the media, and the Colts, and the commercials. I don't want money, and I don't want medals. What I do want is for you to stand there in that f-ggoty white uniform and with your Harvard mouth extend me some f*cking courtesy. You gotta ask me nicely.

Goodell: Just one more question, before I call Mangini to testify-

Belichick: Son, we play in a league that has signals, and those signals have to be recorded by men with cameras. Whose gonna do it? You? You, spokesperson Aiello? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the Jets, and you curse the Patriots. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That the Jets' loss, while tragic, probably improved ratings. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, wins titles. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that sideline, you need me on that sideline. We use words like taping, playbooks, preparation. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the dynasty that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a camera, and record signals. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Goodell: Did you tape the plays?

Belichick: I did the job-

Goodell: Did you tape the plays?

Belichick: You're godd@mn right I did!

(Belichick fined by the league)

Belichick: [yelling] I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and p-ss in your dead skull! You f*cked with the wrong coach!

I had a good laugh. Very good......
 
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