Actual Pats Fan statements:
August 9th, 2006:
-I was disappointed, angry and distraught to learn that Roger Goodell has been elected the new commissioner of the National Football League. He is an attorney who knows nothing about football, and that is a recipe for disaster.
September 11, 2007:
-I was disappointed, angry and distraught to learn that coach Mangini made such a trivial complaint to the league. At the most, if deemed necessary, the league should place a phone call of less than three minutes to coach Belichick clarifying where his staff may operate in the stadium during games.
July 16, 2008:
-I was disappointed, angry and distraught to learn that Boston has failed to retain James Posey. Insodoing, the Celtics are saying to the world, including the league, their opponents, their fans and especially the team, "We are NOT committed to multiple and/or consecutive championships. The players do not have our support. Players, you're on your own." Beyond completely agreeing with Tom Heinsohn's assessment, I can say now that it is over. There will be no more championships.
January 20, 2015:
-I was disappointed, angry and distraught to learn that organizations still attempt to waste the league's time with nonsensical accusations, such as these latest of supposed ball tampering by the Patriots. The Baltimore Ravens and Indianapolis Colts should be penalized and fined for making false, trivial complaints only because they are sore losers.
July 24, 2016:
-I was disappointed, angry and distraught to learn that Mort is still spewing his crap that most people, because they are stupid, believe.