Employee in Bathroom w. balls for 90 secs

[The Gr8est]

Well let's be fair now. It's vital to the integrity of the game that we know whether he peed on the balls.

We may know the real scandal if Andrew Luck contracts e coli.

 

[Gwedd]

You know, that guy with the big ball sack was an NFL employee, right? The ball sack guys are hired and paid by the NFL, as are all of the sideline employees.

So, if he managed to deflate the balls in one sack, then it's an NFL issue and not one where we need to get all hard on the kid with the ball sack.

 

[ctpatsfan77]

Can't imagine Networks not going to take advantage of this.

Discovery Channels 2 hour special debunking Deflate Gate
60 minutes special on Deflate Gate
Mythbusters: the Deflate Gate special
History Channels Deflate Gate: The Untold Story
Lifetime Channels Deflated: A Scandal That Shook The World
E! True Hollywood Story: The Ball Boy: Where Is He Now?
Game Show Network: The PSI Is Right: A game show where you deflate as many balls to 11.5 PSI as fast as possible and you can win a prize!!!!!!!!
PSI: Sports Investigation

PBS: The House of Pressuregauge
QVC: The Pressure Gauge Miracle
OWN: Tyler Perry's The Have Pressures and the Have Nots
CNN: Anderson Cooper 12.5

 

[Froob]

This must be the greatest of Florio's life. No matter who wins he still comes out on top.

 

[Bobsyouruncle]

So much for Ted Wells suggestion that people stop the leaks....

I see what you did there

 

[Gwedd]

PBS: The House of Pressuregauge
QVC: The Pressure Gauge Miracle
OWN: Tyler Perry's The Have Pressures and the Have Nots
CNN: Anderson Cooper 12.5

Disney: Frozen Balls

 

[Captain Cool]

You know, that guy with the big ball sack was an NFL employee, right? The ball sack guys are hired and paid by the NFL, as are all of the sideline employees.

So, if he managed to deflate the balls in one sack, then it's an NFL issue and not one where we need to get all hard on the kid with the ball sack.

I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

 

[Show416]

I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

So in other words if they blame this guy he's not even a Pats employee?? Works for me!

 

[Gwedd]

I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

Nope, what I read was that they were paid by the NFL, so that makes them NFL employees, at least for one day.

 

[FrodoBagginz]

SNL could learn a lot about comedy from just this thread.

 

[Fixit]

Get it? He's "Deflater Mouse."

I'll show myself out.

 

[phil112]

Kraft is going to be getting his apology.

 

[Tunescribe]

well i just went to bathroom with 2 balls for 23 seconds...will glazer investigate me!?!?!?!? uh oh.....

He might, because 23 seconds isn't long enough to do anything.

 

[Joker]

Here's Jay "E.T." Glazer reporting back from Planet Urinal to his boss, the Great Omissioner

 

[hwc]

Let's not forget that Glazer's league sources said that the NFL's crack investigators, after 8 days of top-shelf forensics, have "zero'd in" on this poor kid taking a piss as the focus of their crack investigation.

Baaaa waaaa haaaaa haaaaa. I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I might piss myself....

This a clown show, bro'...

 

[josh24]

Among all the leaks, and their subsequent denials and contradictions, this one wins for being the funniest attempt at hating on the Patriots.

Congrats PFT, you went from planting doubts to straight dumb reports.

 

[Galeb]

This must be the greatest of Florio's life. No matter who wins he still comes out on top.

I heard that he's more of a bottom.

 

[IntentionalSafety]

New NFL procedure: NFL Ball attendants required to go through metal detectors, are subject to full body cavities, and are precluded from using the restrooms while carrying balls.

They are, however, still required to wash their hands.

 

[Betterthanmost]

I am shocked no one wants to know the most important question from this latest leak:
Did he or did he not wash his hands after taking the leak? This is what they should investigate. I hate it when people don't wash their hands and touch my balls.

 

[Galeb]

He might, because 23 seconds isn't long enough to do anything.

23 seconds is enough time to have sex twice.