Bsampson was an interesting poster, but when he realized that he would actually have to back up his rants, he left.
The best protagonist (other than NEM) was Soothsayer who was a Jets fan and I think the owner of the JetsInsider or JetsConfidential message board.
He was dead wrong about the Jets and Pats, but he had moxie and certainly stuck around to support his claims. There were actually a lot of jet fans here for a while because of him. I don't really miss the mboard wars though.
Since I have brought up Soothsayer, anyone who remember him will probably enjoy this skit I made up way back then, when someone else on the board proposed sticking Nem and him on a rocket and launching them...
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Ground Control (GC): Lift off in 5..4..3..2..1........
{The rocket thunders upward. The two astronauts brace themselves as the full impact of the G forces momentarily quiets them. As the rocket begins to level and the air thins, they are able to speak again...}
NEM: What the hell did he just say, my hearing aid has a short in it.
SoothSayer (SS): He said the Pats are flukes, he's a Raider fan, and he only put enough oxygen in the life support system of one of us.
NEM: Well, seeing how I have been a rocket scientist for 33 years and.. . Well, in fact, I was an integral member of the team that designed the radio/cassette player for the Apollo mission. I don't mean to drop names, but you ever heard of Butch Songin, or Rommie Loudd? Yeah, I worked for them. I was a mentor for the Astronaut pilot that was supposed to fly Apollo... a guy named Nate "Crash" Craddock (you remember him)... he ended up going mental a week before liftoff. Kept saying he heard voices in his head all the time. He got really upset whenever he heard my voice...I'm not sure why...
SS: I've already heard this story ten times Nemnuts. Try getting some new material, you Tool.
NEM: Hey look, I am more of a rocket scientist than you will ever be. I care more about rockets than anyone else in the world, but I suppose your limited intellect couldn't possible fathom the importance of that kind of devotion.
SS: You have a tiny johnson don't you? They say guys with tiny johnson's try to compensate for it. Maybe you played with it too much... that could explain your hearing.
NEM: I ain't kidden around any longer... you started this crap you little twerp, you better be able to BACK up your words or get the hell out of hear....
SS: Um, NEM, we're in a rocket you jack *****...
NEM: You're a coward... a yellow bellied coward...
SS: Oh yeah, old fart...
NEM: Yeah fat boy...
{struggle ensues..... something gets hit.... alarms sound... the rocket's flight path becomes uncontrolled}
SS: Nice job you Galactic Dweeb, now you've done it! I knew I should have BANNED you from this mission.
NEM: It's wasn't me. It was that damn Launch Coordinator, Charlie Weiss! He isn't fit to fly a paper airplane, let alone coordinate a rocket launch. He's the worst LC in NASA.
SS: You kicked the computer unit you ***dart...
NEM: I respect your opinion, but your theory is all wet. Charlie should have known to make it kick proof, what kind of Launch Coordinator puts his team in position to lose like this? No imagination! I'll bet the President was in on this too. Who do you think had JFK junior's plane 'malfunction'? ...Paul Wellstone too... you didn't really think THAT was an accident? Some day, when you grow up, you will be able to comprehend all this...
SS: Grow up? We're about to crash Zipper Head!
NEM: I hate you Charlie Weiss!
SS: Are those you're last words? Pathetic! I know you are a senile old fart, but even you can do better than that...
NEM: Have a nice day! {Nem yells sarcastically}
SS: J-E-T-S, Jets! Jets! Jets! ... Patsies blow... Eat my shorts!
{The rocket slams into the ground with a thunderous boom and a fantastic explosion}
Ground Control (GC): Houston... we have a problem. Notify the Launch Coordinator at once.
{The Launch Coordinator, Charlie Weiss, leans back in his leather chair looking out the window at the fiery aftermath of the crash. "Got any more letters for me Smart Guy?" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA...}