Ringgg! Ringgg!
SP: This is Scott. Is that really you, Bill?
BB: Yup. Winning the SB last week made me think of the "Glory Years" we had together, and I just wanted to share a little of it with you.
SP: Great to hear from you, Bill. That's awfully generous. And congratulations on finally winning another Super Bowl. About time. I thought you would pull it off last year, but at least this year you closed the deal. (Gets teary eyed). I sure do miss all those Super Bowls.
BB: Well, it's amazing what you can do with a guy like Tom Brady at QB. Imagine, half the teams in the NFL don't even have a decent starting QB ... Oh, I'm sorry, that was insensitive of me.
SP: Well Bill, I guess you have the right to gloat. I mean, I thought Matt Cassel was going to be special at one point, but he just couldn't get over the hump. But hey, I've got the #1 draft pick, and even Brady can't go on forever.
BB: Yeah, imagine that, the #1 draft pick in a draft without a #1 QB. That really sucks. If it had been last year you could have had Andrew Luck. Think I wouldn't rather see the kid go to you than to those b*st*rds in Indy? As for Brady, he's still going strong. And this kid Mallett is going to be something special, so I'm really not worried about when Brady decides to hang up his cleats.
SP: Something special?
BB: Oh yeah. He always had the arm. He's a really film junkie, and he's been using Brady to learn the finer points of the game. Like I said, I'm just not worried.
SP: How do you think he compares to this year's prospects?
BB: This year? There's nothing coming out. Nothing. Matt Barkley is short and overrated. Geno Smith is a scrambler and overrated. Neither is top 10 material. Mike Glennon? Flavor of the day. Hell, if you took every QB in this draft and packaged them together I wouldn't trade the bunch for Mallett.
SP: You don't say.
BB: You do say. Hey, if I had the #1 pick I'd rather try and trade for a kid like Mallett - not that we'd trade him, mind you - and use the #1 pick on a guy like Jarvis Jones, or a stud LT like Luke Joeckel. Or better yet, trade down and get back what you traded for a real QB, and pick up a couple of solid players. Your defense isn't half bad, and you've got a running game. It's all about putting points on the board - hey, did you like how we shattered the 2007 record, by the way?
SP: Yeah, that was great. You said you wouldn't consider trading the kid.
BB: Not a chance. Not for at least a 1st round pick, and with #1 in the draft, that's not an option for you. Unless you pull a Cleveland and trade back like they did for that turkey Weedon. But there's no one at the top of this draft that any team will give that kind of bonanza for.
SP: Hey, wat about #33 overall? You always said that was better than a 1st round pick.
BB: Yeah, but that was before I wasted the damn 33rd pick on Dowling in 2011. Besides, draft picks are overrated. Look how Greg Bedard howled about trading a bloody 4th for Aqib Talib - his 2 pick 6's started the SB rout for us. No, I've decided that all that stockpiling draft picks and trading into the future stuff was overrated.
SP: I see your point. But this is a pretty deep draft, from what I hear. You might get someone who can actually play around 33. What do you say we think it over?
BB: Well, I hate Oakland and Denver, and I'd love to see someone actually put Peyton in his place. I'll think about it. But don't hold your breath - the kid is good, and I think I'd have to be a fool to do that trade. But I'll think about it.
SP: Gee thanks Bill. I'll call you next week. Bye. And great SB win. Really great.
BB: Thanks. Talk to you later Scott.
(Hangs up, grinning).
