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Bill Simmons thoughts on Cassel


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Gainzo

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This cracked me up as The Sports Guy hit the nail on the head about Easterbrook.

22. San Francisco 49ers

Don't be surprised if Matt Cassel lands with the 49ers in the offseason.
Here's my wild theory: The Patriots will franchise Matt Cassel in fear that Tom Brady might not make it back in time for the 2009 season. By mid-July, when it becomes clear Brady is fine, Cassel quietly will go on the market … and, of course, the Niners will be sitting there waiting for him. As soon as Cassel becomes available, San Fran will toss the Pats a 2010 No. 1 and a 2011 No. 2, then rip up his contract and give him something like $55 million for seven years with a $24 million signing bonus. Everybody wins. Well, until Gregg Easterbrook follows that sequence with an 8,500-word column about the Pats cheating the system again and suggests Bill Belichick should be thrown in a maximum security prison and tortured until he admits his sins and we can ban him from football once and for all.

ESPN Page 2 - Sports Guy's NFL Power Poll
 
lol! That is hilarious. Thanks for the post.

Thought ESPN stopped publishing his stuff a few months ago, didn't it??
 
I'd been losing respect for Simmons for about the last 4-5 years as he became less and less Boston, and more and more annoying, but that is a pretty classic verbal beating right there on a co-worker. Well done, Sports Guy.
 
I thought this was pretty funny too.


By the way, I think Eric Mangini should be forced to gain 30 pounds and grow a mustache so he can replace Mike Holmgren in the Half-Asleep and Overweight NFL Coaches With a Mustache Club.
 
I thought this was pretty funny too.

By the way, I think Eric Mangini should be forced to gain 30 pounds and grow a mustache so he can replace Mike Holmgren in the Half-Asleep and Overweight NFL Coaches With a Mustache Club.

This was one of his better columns. That line cracked me up as well.
 
Yes, Simmons has somewhat redeemed himself with that verbal smackdown of Easterbrook.
I'd like to see him go a little further with that.:D
 
Um, how many times do the Pats come up in this article? A lot...

This is a very good, but sadly unchangeable, point:

As a football fan, I don't know which AFC West contender becoming a playoff team would offend me more. … At gunpoint, I guess I'd go with the Chargers, since Philip Rivers said after the comeback in K.C., "I know we are 6-8, but that win said a lot about the character of our team." He's right -- laying a stinkbomb for 55 minutes, then being handed the game by an abominably coached team says a lot. Just know that if a gutty 11-5 Pats team is forced to sit out the playoffs because NFL rules demand that one of these two crappy AFC West teams be included, I'm sending a special homemade batch of holiday turd egg nog to the NFL offices with the note "ATTN: Roger Goodell." Damn it all.
 
One of Bill's best in years. It seems that after his power struggle with ESPN, he has a bit more leeway. Before, his editors would never have allowed that to slip through. Glad finally Bill can say his mind.
 
Pretty good power poll. Tough to argue with. And his analysis of Colts/Steelers as 1a & 1b is spot on. (Esp. love the dig at the end. :))

I can't choose between them, and here's why: Remember the scene in "Rain Man" when Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman catch fire at the blackjack table, and there's that one hand when Cruise gets blackjack, raises his hands happily, then does the incredulous Cruise laugh for a few seconds? That's the Steelers and the Colts right now. They're winning every conceivable type of hand and catching every break, and after a while, you start waiting for their coaches (Tony Dungy and Mike Tomlin) to raise their hands happily and do the Incredulous Cruise Laugh. I thought for sure Dungy would dust it off Thursday night when David Garrard threw the game-ending TAINT out of nowhere to Keiwan Ratliff. Didn't happen.

Luck is a major part of football, whether we like to admit it or not … but at the same time, you make your own luck to a certain degree. With Jacksonville frantically trying to tie Thursday's game in the final seconds, Maurice Jones-Drew got racked by two Colts on a screen pass and couldn't get up, leading to a 10-second run-off and Jones-Drew being removed from the game. That was a classic part-luck/part-skill moment. But when Dwight Freeney finished off the Jags by demolishing their left tackle and sacking Garrard to end the game, that was just skill and talent. The best teams take advantage of every opening they're given. And if winning football is a mixture of making plays, not making mistakes and getting a sprinkle of good fortune at the right times, you can't do it any better than Indy and Pittsburgh have been doing it lately.

Just remember, if they meet in the playoffs -- and odds are, they will -- there will be only one horseshoe available.
 
I would be more than happy with a 1st and 2nd return on Matt Cassel, but do you really think the 49ers want to go two years in a row with us enjoying their top 15 pick in the draft? I know they need a QB, but that would leave a sour taste in their mouths for sure.
 
Its not that he's afraid of taking shots at ESPN. Its that they are his editors and ultimately decide what parts of his column make it and what parts get cut. In this case, I think the editors had already left for the holidays.
 
Easterbrook is a guest columnist at ESPN, which may affect Simmons' ability to write about him compared to regular contributors.
 
I remember Simmons reaction when Cassel first stepped in...

Simmons: Gone in eight minutes
After Tom Brady's injury, the Sports Guy is proclaiming the 2008 Patriots' season officially over. The readers try to ease his pain.

What a surreal feeling when your season gets assassinated before it really starts.

Getting final word on the Brady injury felt like being an actor on a cop show and identifying a murder victim at the morgue: Yep, that's it. That's the 2008 Pats season. You can pull the sheet back over it. Thanks.

....you're always one play away from having the likes of Bernard Pollard randomly end your season....

Anyway, I must have been in denial for most of Sunday because I even had the "I wonder if we can talk Daunte Culpepper out of retirement" conversation with someone.

...the Pats didn't just lose Brady, they might lose Randy Moss, too. His track record of quitting on bad quarterbacks is both extensive and frightening. I don't even want to talk about this.

Nobody believes in the '08 Patriots without Brady. This might be a good thing, right? Um … right?

(Oh, who am I kidding? We're screwed. I will now attempt to hang myself with my Wes Welker jersey.)
 
How was he any different from 99.9% of the fans (real and bandwagon) for NE?

Not even 99.9% of this board was saying our season was officially over.

There's a difference from being completely devastated to giving up all hope for the season.

I remember him and Pete Prisco doing so, then the very next week saying "Maybe I was wrong, lolz"
 
Not even 99.9% of this board was saying our season was officially over.

There's a difference from being completely devastated to giving up all hope for the season.

I remember him and Pete Prisco doing so, then the very next week saying "Maybe I was wrong, lolz"
Guess it's a good thing I avoided the media back then, I'm sure I saved myself a great deal of stress. :D
 
Did you notice that Eli suddenly stinks? This is what happens when an ordinary QB doesn't have the benefit of throwing against an eight-man front that's stacking the line while his best wide receiver is getting double-covered. Keep looking up -- you don't want him landing on you at 540 mph as he finishes his fall back to earth. Also, keep telling yourself that your seventh-string wide receiver catching a pseudo-Hail Mary off the top of his helmet with your season on the line wasn't the single luckiest play in sports history. In fact, David Tyree himself just admitted this to me. I'm writing this at an IHOP right now, and he just brought me a plate of blueberry pancakes. Did you know you can work at IHOP when you're on injured reserve? Apparently so. I have to go because I'm going to throw a cannister of boysenberry syrup at him as hard as I can and see whether he catches it off his head. Worst of luck in the playoffs.
Sincerely,
Bitter Guy


about the giants...

it was a great column
 
Yeah, Simmons has been struggling with ESPN. That comment about Easterbrook shows that the gloves have come off.
 
Not even 99.9% of this board was saying our season was officially over.
No, but back in preseason when it was so popular to badmouth Cassel many here said that with Cassel our season would be over, and more than one maroon said we could easily go 0-16 with Cassel.
 
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