(Satire) Belichicks take on Squealers

[Crazyeechrispats1]

Awesome Football Exclusive
Hello this is Ricky Barret at Awesome football Exclusive and do we have a interesting tidbit to share with the NFL fan bases all across the world.
For your enjoyment we have a exclusive very personal interview with none other than Bill Belichick head coach of the UNDEFEATED New England Patriots.
Now people say the Patriots have a heavy task to complete this Sunday Belichick not only concurs but has formatted a new defense which is guaranteed to turn Big Ben to a non factor the whole game!

RB- Bill how are you doing today?
BB. I'm fine were fine everybody's fine.
RB. Yes well you didn't look like you were to healthy the other day giving that press conference after the huge comeback win against the Baltimore Ravens.
BB. I'm fine
RB. Right, well your definitely not getting the easy treatment that one would expect for and undefeated team.
You had the Eagles at home Baltimore on the road and now you have a motivated and hungry Pittsburgh team coming to the Razor.
BB. We just play whoever's on our schedule we have no control over that were not the Colts you know.
RB. Sure, well **** Lebeau is known as a premier defensive mastermind
BB. I'm sure he is
RB. Do you agree
BB. I'm just trying to coach this team Rick win another game to go 1 and 0
RB. Well what do you think he's gonna throw at your offense this week?
BB. (plays with yo-yo) well I think he's gonna attempt to stop us from scoring points and we'll more than likey be trying the same.
RB. What is it about his defense that so many teams have trouble with.
BB. Well he gives you alot of looks.
RB. Oh ok well for those who don't know I'm gonna explain you mean switching who's blitzing who's got their hand on the ground who's standing.
BB. No No I meant when your leading by 3 touchdowns first he looks upset, sometimes unsure, he get's this I just watched the 2 girls one cup video over and over again expression then he get's that I don't know what to do who can I call look as well.
RB. Wow so your pretty confident then I take it going into this game.
BB. The Steelers are a great team
RB. But you just said
BB. There a great team they do alot on defense there offense is unpredictable they show you alot.
RB. Oh but didn't you just say o nevermind
BB. We've come up with the game plan this week well me Pees and our good friends at Suzuki.
RB. What did you say Suzuki?
BB. We got the fastest bike on the market redid the engine to make it 3 times as fast painted really cool skulls and fire balls you know things that Ben would like and were gonna sit it right outside the visiting locker room right before kickoff.
RB. Wow are you serious
BB. Very serious Ben is a great QB he can hurt you in alot of different ways he's improving his decision making everyone on that team can catch and run with the ball well they block well.
Were gonna need all 60 minutes to pull this out every second.
RB. Well didn't you say you were just gonna have a motorcycle sitting outside.
BB. No I drive a towncar i don't know what your talking about Ricky can we keep it all football please.
RB. Sure I guess but
BB. Great just Great can't wait to see that meathead try that cowboy crap on these roads out here.
RB. What did you say?
BB. Ben is very brave he makes plays out of nothing he turns a a negative into a positive a real cowboy out there when he's running out of the pocket.
RB. Oh
BB. Can we hurry this up I gotta booty call and her husband should be home any minute.
RB. What
BB. This is my reading time I just got into something real good and I intend to finish it.
RB. Sure Bill Belichick everybody was great having you on.
BB. Yeah I'm sure you Idiotic reporting piece of dirt.
RB. Excuse me?
BB. We should do this again you do some fine reporting does Monday work?
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[Crazyeechrispats1]

I'm bumping this cause I think all Pats fans should read it,
include your opinions please.

 

[RussFrancis]

just read that again. for clarity. and again, it cracked me hard. love the muttering, speaking under the breath stammering. I was just envisioining a BB PC while I went thru it, monotoned, bland. You need to send that in. I dont know where, but it needs to be sent in. somewhere. Loved the 'looks', the waiting 'appointment', and the 'cowboy' setup. nice work. send it in. Ill keep bumping it, if it slows, so dont sweat that.

 

[Crazyeechrispats1]

Thanks man it only took me like 10 minutes to write it shows how bored I am tonight lol.

I just hope the Steeler trolls get to see it.

 

[PatsfanGlo]

BB. No No I meant when your leading by 3 touchdowns first he looks upset, sometimes unsure, he get's this I just watched the 2 girls one cup video over and over again expression then he get's that I don't know what to do who can I call look as well.
__________________

ROFL Suzuki bike outside visitor's lockerroom. Very funny man. Sitting here, chuckling and giggling like an idiot here.

 

[Crazyeechrispats1]

thanks glo appreciate that man

 

[nashvillepatsfan]

thats awesome. do some more, i need a good laugh:rocker:

 

[Crazyeechrispats1]

Thanks Nashville I'll see what I can do in my spare time.

 

[Hollywood_Brady]

man, thats funny... respect.

 

[Crazyeechrispats1]

thanks hollywood

 

[PatsFanInVa]

well, you know, it's pretty good. It does a few things, a few things pretty well, and you could try to build on that, and any time you have a few things you can do, you try to use those things. It is what it is. It did some things we didn't expect, and it did a lot of things that frankly, we were ready for. More of those things. If you can execute on those things and isolate them you can really get through some defenses, but again, a lot of the time we were ready for those, and that's why we got through it without, you know, laughing a lot of the time.

 

[AStack75]

RB. Oh ok well for those who don't know I'm gonna explain you mean switching who's blitzing who's got their hand on the ground who's standing.
BB. No No I meant when your leading by 3 touchdowns first he looks upset, sometimes unsure, he get's this I just watched the 2 girls one cup video over and over again expression then he get's that I don't know what to do who can I call look as well.

If you don't know what that means....don't ask!