upstater1
Hall of Fame Poster
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2005
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Trying to learn and understand from someone isn't treating them like a token at all. IMO, it's a lot more respectful than ignoring or repressing something. That said, if he or she is uncomfortable about discussing the topic, avoidance is the respectful avenue. Obviously friendship has a lot more aspects than talking about one subject, but that doesn't mean that a subject should only be approached by one side.
One of my best friends is a successful black author. Although our friendship isn't dominated by our conversations about white/black relations and culture, it's certainly a major component. Sure, we've had our disagreements, but we've learned a lot from each other, and our mutual respect is ever growing. Neither one of us has ever felt like a "token" anything.
You're not getting me. This isn't a question of uncomfortability at all. I'm not uncomfortable. He's not uncomfortable. We're not ignoring anything. Not repressing anything. We have better things to talk (and argue) about. He has enough from other people asking what his opinion about something that's going on on some reservation in Montana etc. etc. It's not a matter of comfort. It's a matter of giving the guy a break.