I’ve been around here since close to the beginning under various screen names (I’m awful with passwords). I found Miguel first, and he led me to Patsfans. I had no idea at the time how much this place would come to mean to me. I had no idea that one day Patsfans would save my life.
It was October 1st 2015. My marriage was ending, and I was totally broken. Overwhelming sadness and hopelessness had brought me to the point where I had decided to get my affairs in order and to end my life in the early morning hours of October 8th. My mind was made up.
Then, while at work on the 1st, I signed on to Patsfans as I often did and still do just to see if anything was going on. “I could use your thoughts and prayers” was the thread title. Another poster was going through the same thing and entertaining the same thoughts as me, and he had the courage to share those thoughts and ask for help which he was getting in post after post from PatsFans’ members.
Imagine the odds of having decided to commit suicide only to find a thoughtful conversation on the subject had broken out on the football fan forum that I checked routinely every day? On my lunch hour, I posted my story and what I was planning. By the time I got home after work, there was post after post and multiple PMs of concern and encouragement. From people all over the world. From a soldier stationed in Afghanistan. It was unbelievable. It was a miracle.
Ian emailed me that night. He would email or text me everyday for months as I slowly got my feet back under me. I consider him a great friend. From that experience, I met an incredible young man and fellow poster who lives near me and puts up with my old man ways and stories. We’ve watched games together and it’s a rare day we don’t share a text or two. I’m so grateful for his friendship. And, the poster who originally sought some “thoughts and prayers” is now a dear friend of mine. We have helped each other keep the darkness of depression away over these last nearly 6 years.
Thank you, Ian. That you harbor any regrets about your operation of this place and your dealings with us is a testimony to the size of your heart and the depth of your character.