Employee in Bathroom w. balls for 90 secs

The Gr8est · Jan 26, 2015

BradyFTW! said:
Well let's be fair now. It's vital to the integrity of the game that we know whether he peed on the balls.

We may know the real scandal if Andrew Luck contracts e coli.

Gwedd · Jan 26, 2015

You know, that guy with the big ball sack was an NFL employee, right? The ball sack guys are hired and paid by the NFL, as are all of the sideline employees.

So, if he managed to deflate the balls in one sack, then it's an NFL issue and not one where we need to get all hard on the kid with the ball sack.

ctpatsfan77 · Jan 26, 2015

FrodoBagginz said:
Can't imagine Networks not going to take advantage of this.

Discovery Channels 2 hour special debunking Deflate Gate
60 minutes special on Deflate Gate
Mythbusters: the Deflate Gate special
History Channels Deflate Gate: The Untold Story
Lifetime Channels Deflated: A Scandal That Shook The World
E! True Hollywood Story: The Ball Boy: Where Is He Now?
Game Show Network: The PSI Is Right: A game show where you deflate as many balls to 11.5 PSI as fast as possible and you can win a prize!!!!!!!!
PSI: Sports Investigation

PBS: The House of Pressuregauge
QVC: The Pressure Gauge Miracle
OWN: Tyler Perry's The Have Pressures and the Have Nots
CNN: Anderson Cooper 12.5

Froob · Jan 26, 2015

This must be the greatest of Florio's life. No matter who wins he still comes out on top.

Bobsyouruncle · Jan 26, 2015

hwc said:
So much for Ted Wells suggestion that people stop the leaks....

I see what you did there

Gwedd · Jan 26, 2015

ctpatsfan77 said:
PBS: The House of Pressuregauge
QVC: The Pressure Gauge Miracle
OWN: Tyler Perry's The Have Pressures and the Have Nots
CNN: Anderson Cooper 12.5

Disney: Frozen Balls

Captain Cool · Jan 26, 2015

Gwedd said:
You know, that guy with the big ball sack was an NFL employee, right? The ball sack guys are hired and paid by the NFL, as are all of the sideline employees.

So, if he managed to deflate the balls in one sack, then it's an NFL issue and not one where we need to get all hard on the kid with the ball sack.

I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

Show416 · Jan 26, 2015

Captain Cool said:
I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

So in other words if they blame this guy he's not even a Pats employee?? Works for me!

Gwedd · Jan 26, 2015

Captain Cool said:
I thought that they were hired by the team, but they are actually NFL employees.

Nope, what I read was that they were paid by the NFL, so that makes them NFL employees, at least for one day.

FrodoBagginz · Jan 26, 2015

SNL could learn a lot about comedy from just this thread.

Fixit · Jan 26, 2015

Get it? He's "Deflater Mouse."

I'll show myself out.

phil112 · Jan 26, 2015

Kraft is going to be getting his apology.

Tunescribe · Jan 26, 2015

Brady_to_Moss said:
well i just went to bathroom with 2 balls for 23 seconds...will glazer investigate me!?!?!?!? uh oh.....

He might, because 23 seconds isn't long enough to do anything.

Joker · Jan 26, 2015

Here's Jay "E.T." Glazer reporting back from Planet Urinal to his boss, the Great Omissioner

hwc · Jan 26, 2015

Let's not forget that Glazer's league sources said that the NFL's crack investigators, after 8 days of top-shelf forensics, have "zero'd in" on this poor kid taking a piss as the focus of their crack investigation.

Baaaa waaaa haaaaa haaaaa. I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I might piss myself....

This a clown show, bro'...

josh24 · Jan 26, 2015

Among all the leaks, and their subsequent denials and contradictions, this one wins for being the funniest attempt at hating on the Patriots.

Congrats PFT, you went from planting doubts to straight dumb reports.

Galeb · Jan 26, 2015

Froob said:
This must be the greatest of Florio's life. No matter who wins he still comes out on top.

I heard that he's more of a bottom.

IntentionalSafety · Jan 26, 2015

New NFL procedure: NFL Ball attendants required to go through metal detectors, are subject to full body cavities, and are precluded from using the restrooms while carrying balls.

They are, however, still required to wash their hands.

Betterthanmost · Jan 26, 2015

I am shocked no one wants to know the most important question from this latest leak:
Did he or did he not wash his hands after taking the leak? This is what they should investigate. I hate it when people don't wash their hands and touch my balls.

Galeb · Jan 26, 2015

Tunescribe said:
He might, because 23 seconds isn't long enough to do anything.

23 seconds is enough time to have sex twice.

Employee in Bathroom w. balls for 90 secs

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