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It's just post-draft, and I have found myself spontaneously generating these while Chungmania is still in full bloom - including in my own heart of hearts.
Rules: This is essentially the Chuck Norris routine, but you can't just change a Chuck Norris joke. The more specific to Chung/football/Pats the better (even if my own examples aren't exactly game-day material.)
Here are some to start with, from recent posts.... some of them worked better in paragraph form than as stand-alones:
Patrick Chung, pound for pound, is stronger than sarin gas.
Patrick Chung is stronger than a Rosie O'Donnell queef.
Patrick Chung has a neurotoxin in his saliva that he can selectively breathe at receivers to throw them off their routes... he just chooses not to because then you don't get to hit them.
Okay admittedly those don't rise to the full level of overdone awe we're looking for, so I've composed these "occasional Chungisms" to get us underway:
Patrick Chung doesn't bat the ball away, the ball flees voluntarily and sometimes can't brake in time.
Bob Sanders is a guided missile. Patrick Chung is an ICBM. (and the related, "Patrick Chung is where the Pentagon got the name "Patriot Missile." ")
When you're gameplanning the 09 Pats, there's actually four things that can happen on a pass play, and three of them are bad: interceptions, incompletes, and the worst one, Patrick Chung.
Patrick Chung's out for blood. When Patrick Chung's playing, the whole field is the red zone.
QBs playing against Chung have been clocked at 4.4 during safety blitzes. Patrick Chung still caught them.
Patrick Chung's what would happen if Ray Lewis played safety... and was meaner.
Patrick Chung can't really fly. The field just gets scared.
Patrick Chung = MC^2.
Patrick Chung hits are so massive they have smaller hits in orbit around them.
Detroit's studying Patrick Chung so they can develop a non-stop motor.
Patrick Chung's from Jamaica. Like other Jamaican exports, he makes you fall down and cough. Unlike other Jamaican exports, he makes you cough blood. Also, you don't laugh or feel better the next day.
Okay that's all I got for now. It's Sunday, it's May, it's raining, screw it. Have a sense of humor and play "Patrick Chungisms" with me. I'm very bored.
PFnV
Rules: This is essentially the Chuck Norris routine, but you can't just change a Chuck Norris joke. The more specific to Chung/football/Pats the better (even if my own examples aren't exactly game-day material.)
Here are some to start with, from recent posts.... some of them worked better in paragraph form than as stand-alones:
Patrick Chung, pound for pound, is stronger than sarin gas.
Patrick Chung is stronger than a Rosie O'Donnell queef.
Patrick Chung has a neurotoxin in his saliva that he can selectively breathe at receivers to throw them off their routes... he just chooses not to because then you don't get to hit them.
Okay admittedly those don't rise to the full level of overdone awe we're looking for, so I've composed these "occasional Chungisms" to get us underway:
Patrick Chung doesn't bat the ball away, the ball flees voluntarily and sometimes can't brake in time.
Bob Sanders is a guided missile. Patrick Chung is an ICBM. (and the related, "Patrick Chung is where the Pentagon got the name "Patriot Missile." ")
When you're gameplanning the 09 Pats, there's actually four things that can happen on a pass play, and three of them are bad: interceptions, incompletes, and the worst one, Patrick Chung.
Patrick Chung's out for blood. When Patrick Chung's playing, the whole field is the red zone.
QBs playing against Chung have been clocked at 4.4 during safety blitzes. Patrick Chung still caught them.
Patrick Chung's what would happen if Ray Lewis played safety... and was meaner.
Patrick Chung can't really fly. The field just gets scared.
Patrick Chung = MC^2.
Patrick Chung hits are so massive they have smaller hits in orbit around them.
Detroit's studying Patrick Chung so they can develop a non-stop motor.
Patrick Chung's from Jamaica. Like other Jamaican exports, he makes you fall down and cough. Unlike other Jamaican exports, he makes you cough blood. Also, you don't laugh or feel better the next day.
Okay that's all I got for now. It's Sunday, it's May, it's raining, screw it. Have a sense of humor and play "Patrick Chungisms" with me. I'm very bored.
PFnV