Well, it's Christmas time. And I thought "What better way to show the people that I really care about how much I love them than to name right here in this space, the gifts I would give them if money were no object?" Of course, most of these people will be stuck with same crummy gifts that I get them every year. Please excuse some of the inside jokes. Hey, I write this column and try to entertain you every week. Humor me for once.
For Joe Namath: Breath mints for the next time he wants to try to kiss Suzy Kolber on national television.
For Vikings coach Mike Tice: A new stick of gum to chew on and a new pencil to stick behind his ear. This guy always looks like he is ready to build a deck.
For Patriots Defensive Coordinator Romeo Crennel: A well-deserved head-coaching job.
For the lovely and talented Mrs. Rousseau: I'll let Broadway Joe say it all-"I want to kiss you."
For Marky Mark, our tailgating general: A new tank of propane so that you have a backup the next time I forget to shut the valve off and leave us with no propane the following week.
For residents of the Town of Foxboro: Recognition that their town is no longer "a drinking town with a football problem."
For my best friend Bill Penta: Reimbursement for all the cigars I have tried to smoke over the years while tailgating but just couldn't finish before passing out.
For Patsfans.com head honcho and dear friend Ian Logue: Some recognition and appreciation from the mainstream media for the professional, entertaining website that he has nurtured. You wouldn't believe how much time he puts into this thing. Mrs. Logue, you must be a very understanding woman.
For the crowd at Patriots Football Weekly: Some recognition that they publish one of the best club-generated weekly magazines in the entire League.
For Saints receiver Joe Horn: Some humility like LaDanian Tomlinson shows after he scores a touchdown.
For ESPN's Paul Maguire: Something else to start off his commentary with other than "Let me tell you something…."
For Clem and Dale on the morning WZON 620 show: A mental health exam for putting me over the airwaves every Monday morning at 8:20 a.m.
For the American Journal, Scarborough Current, Lakes Region SuburbanWeekly, the Maine Standard Times, and the Waterboro Reporter: My gratitude for needing something-okay, anything- to fill up space every week and choosing my weekly column to do it.
For CNNSI's Peter King: A Starbucks intravenous pump for his "coffeenerdness" habit.
For the rest of us who don't have Direct TV: The NFL Network and access to Sunday Ticket.
For Gil and Gino: Many more years of health and calling Patriot games.
For Tampa Bay kicker Martin Gramatica: Some bigger shoulder pads.
For ESPN's Monday Night Countdown's Michelle Tafoya: A new hairdo. I highly recommend Duke's Rotary Barber Shop in beautiful downtown Augusta, Maine for all of my haircare needs.
For Dwight Robson: To finally get off his duff and start writing for patsfans.com
To my cubicle-mate, Kim: A pair of earplugs so she doesn't have to listen to non-stop Patriots talk for the rest of her career.
Okay, that's it. I would like to take this opportunity to wish all of you out there a safe and happy holiday. I would also like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who have continued to support and encourage me throughout the year. I am very grateful to have all of you pass through my life.
Feel free to drop me a line. I can be reached at [email protected].
Don't forget to check me out at 8:20 on Monday mornings on Bangor, Maine's sports radio leader, WZON 620 "The Zone." You can listen over the internet at www.zoneradio.com This column also appears in the Waterboro (ME) Reporter, the Maine Standard Times (Lewiston/Auburn, ME), the American Journal (Westbrook, ME) and the Lakes Region Suburban Weekly (Windham, ME).
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