- Joined
- Apr 3, 2006
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Luckily, there's a Secret Mostly-Natural Recipe that Peyton can recommend for his good friend Tom Brady to recover from an injury.
What you'll need
Ingredients
What you'll need
- A stove.
- A pot.
- A glass or cup.
- A small cutting knife.
- A spoon.
- A syringe ostensibly used for purposes other than directly violating NFL regulations by using an unequivocally banned substance to recover from an injury.
Ingredients
- 1 fresh, organic lemon.
- 1 cup of distilled water.
- 5 mL of doctor prescribed HGH that has been sent to your wife through the mail ostensibly for her own medical needs, an explanation that is so absurdly silly and far fetched that only the Manning ball-washing media would dare say it with a straight face.
- Pour water into pot.
- Heat on medium until water is comfortably hot.
- Pour water from pot into cup.
- Cut lemon with knife.
- Squeeze lemon into cup.
- Mix with spoon for 30 seconds until lemon and water ratio is consistent.
- Drink lemon water.
- Put HGH into syringe and inject into body.
- Discard needle using bio-hazard bag.
- Angrily deny any accusations regarding the use of HGH should someone disclose this incident to the public.
- If necessary, hire a spin control team, including a former White House spokesperson, for PR purposes.
- Blame teammates when, despite your unethically obtained good health, you inevitably choke like a dog in the playoffs.
