OT: File this under "Dumb criminals, NFL edition"

ctpatsfan77 · Oct 14, 2014

http://espn.go.com/dallas/nfl/story...cowboys-rb-joseph-randle-arrested-shoplifting

Frisco Police Lt. Jason Jenkins said [Dallas running back Joseph] Randle is accused of attempting to steal underwear and cologne from Dillard's in Stonebriar Centre Mall.

The arrest report states that store security officers, watching via the closed-circuit surveillance system, observed Randle purchase an item at the perfume counter before walking to the underwear section and concealing merchandise in his Dillard's bag. He then exited the store before being stopped by security in the parking lot.

Joseph Randle, who has a base salary of $495,000 in 2014, is accused of stealing underwear and cologne from a Dillard's in a suburban mall.

The store security officers recovered from Randle a two-pack of black Polo underwear valued at $39.50 and an almost full "tester" bottle of Gucci Guilty Black cologne valued at $84.

For God's sake, you're making $500K a year, and you need to try and shoplift underwear and cologne? Can't you just wait for it to go on sale?

Mike the Brit · Oct 14, 2014

I like the name of the cologne: "Guilty". Yes! Still ... sign the beast.

skspikex2 · Oct 15, 2014

FreeTedWilliams · Oct 15, 2014

$39.50 for two pairs of underwear? For that price you should get more than "support" from that underwear.

varjao · Oct 15, 2014

what's the latest news on AP ? Is he still on that exempt list?

Urgent · Oct 15, 2014

"It's a fair cop."

The story in the Globe this morning said that, when apprehended, he responded "Y'all got me on this one." Bit of an admission of guilt.

ctpatsfan77 · Oct 15, 2014

FreeTedWilliams said:
$39.50 for two pairs of underwear? For that price you should get more than "support" from that underwear.

One of the big "secrets" of the clothing biz is that almost all the merchandise that ever gets sold is stuff that's on sale. [Part of JCPenney's reasoning in their "let's eliminate sales" move a few years ago was that something like 98% of their revenue came from items on sale at the time.]

Gwedd · Oct 15, 2014

ctpatsfan77 said:
One of the big "secrets" of the clothing biz is that almost all the merchandise that ever gets sold is stuff that's on sale. [Part of JCPenney's reasoning in their "let's eliminate sales" move a few years ago was that something like 98% of their revenue came from items on sale at the time.]

It's the same way in the furniture business. The retail outlets mark up their furniture WAY above the actual suggested price. Then they can offer it at 40%-60% off and still make a profit. In fact, many times that sale price is what the actual retail price of the item should be.

Kontradiction · Oct 15, 2014

How do we know that Randle didn't forget his wallet at home and **** himself while he was out and about? Easy answer? WE DON'T.

ctpatsfan77 · Oct 15, 2014

KontradictioN said:
How do we know that Randle didn't forget his wallet at home and **** himself while he was out and about? Easy answer? WE DON'T.

Huh? What the heck does this even mean?

In any case:

The arrest report states that store security officers, watching via the closed-circuit surveillance system, observed Randle purchase an item at the perfume counter before walking to the underwear section and concealing merchandise in his Dillard's bag. He then exited the store before being stopped by security in the parking lot.

So clearly he could have purchased the stuff if he wanted to.

Kontradiction · Oct 15, 2014

ctpatsfan77 said:
Huh? What the heck does this even mean?

Maybe the cashier was hot and he didn't want to walk up there with **** in his pants.

ctpatsfan77 · Oct 15, 2014

KontradictioN said:
Maybe the cashier was hot and he didn't want to walk up there with **** in his pants.

And now we have entered Chewbacca defense territory.

Jackson 2 · Oct 15, 2014

Urgent said:
"It's a fair cop."

The story in the Globe this morning said that, when apprehended, he responded "Y'all got me on this one." Bit of an admission of guilt.

His response would seem to imply that there have been other, more successful attempts than "this one." Who says there are no MENSA members in the NFL?

Kontradiction · Oct 15, 2014

ctpatsfan77 said:
And now we have entered Chewbacca defense territory.

Look, pal, I don't know about you but if I'm walking into a store with a heater in the ass of my pants, I'm not looking to talk to the blonde at the register.

OT: File this under "Dumb criminals, NFL edition"

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