As The Ball Bounces: Super Bowl

Thirty years ago, the Miami Dolphins completed their magical 17-0 season with a 14-7 win in Super Bowl VII over Washington. The only Redskin touchdown came as a result of the most embarrassing moment in the career of the great former Fish kicker, Garo Yepremian. Someone was asked how to stop the Dolphin kicking game, and that person replied, "Tighten the immigration laws." Yepremian's "pass" off of a muffed field goal attempt resulted in the only Redskin score of the day, late in the game. But the Fish held on, and their perfect season remained permanently intact. The left-footed Armenian kicker knocks one out of the end zone, 69 yards farther than he is able to throw a football.

Here are more reasons to be happy that the Raiders lost.

There's more turmoil in their clubhouse than there is on Miller Lite Beer commercials.

Who's the worst Raider teammate of them all? Barret Robbins?

Not a chance.

Anyone who laughs over losing a Super Bowl is a piece of crap to start with.

That's pretty much what Regan Upshaw did after being asked about his three offsides calls.

WWTD? Insert the word "Tuna" where the "T" is.

Obviously Bill Callahan tolerates stupid penalties more than the new Dallas head coach does.

Now, ask Upshaw's teammates what they thought of the laughing.

Talk to Sam Adams. Or Frank Middleton.

Speaking of Middleton, he had some neat things to say about Robbins.

You all know Middleton. Our nickname for this guy is "Not today!" Go fetch your Super Bowl XXXVI DVD. Go to the Snow Bowl section and you'll see ol' number 73 telling the Foxborough faithful that they got that game in the bag.

Middleton figures to be a cap casualty anyway. But if Robbins comes back, Middleton will leave the Raiders.

No Raider would offer comfort and support for their Pro Bowl center.

It just so happens that Robbins suffers from depression, and he's still in the hospital.

And he's also on suicide watch.

Sounds like it's time to pray for this guy instead of castigating him.

But remember, these are the Raiders we're talking about.

Oh, well, at least one good thing came out of this, other than Oakland losing on Sunday.

Robbins is a scratch from the Pro Bowl.

His replacement? Damien Woody. Congrats to the pride of Chestnut Hill.

Geek of the Week: Al Davis. Great deal, huh? Way to drive Jon Gruden out of Oakland. Let's hear it for commitment to excellence. Just win, baby. Attaboy.

It might not be a bad idea to see if Malcolm Glazer wouldn't mind entertaining a deal to bring Greg Spires back to Foxborough.

News item: Monte Kiffin is being sought by San Francisco to interview for their head coaching job.

Doubly good news for the Patriots.

If the Bucs say yes, this writer says Kiffin is the new Niners coach, and Romeo Crennel stays put.

And, by taking away Kiffin from the Bucs, their terrific defense suddenly becomes beatable.

That is, assuming the Patriots are there to try and win their Vince back.

The Buccaneer offense actually did okay on Sunday. But take away those picks and you're talking a six-point game and a different approach by the Raiders. The defense rests.

Major kudos go out to Warren Sapp and Keyshawn Johnson.

We like both men for actually showing some humility.

Sapp was actually speechless.

And Johnson took the win over needing to have the damn ball thrown to him.

Remember him: Bill Belichick. He used to be the reigning Super Bowl winning coach. He also used to be the reigning coaching genius of the NFL. It seems like he's happy that he's neither right now, especially the latter.

Didn't it seem wrong to have Celine Dion sing God Bless America, given that she hails from Canada?

Nothing against a lovely lady named Shanaia Twain. But U2's halftime show last year was killer.

That tribute to September 11th was the greatest single Super Bowl halftime event in the history of the game.

Back to Shanaia. Love that tune of hers, Man, I Feel Like A Woman. But it came 17 Super Bowls too late. It was needed at Super Bowl XX. And it should have been dedicated to Tony Eason.

When will some network executive stand up and say that four hours for a pregame show was simply too darned long?

This Game Before The Game thing is getting scary.

Honk if you miss the Bud Bowl.

Next coaching problem for the Patriots: Detroit, who finally wised up and fired Marty Mornhinweg.

The only thing wrong with that deal is that Matt Millen didn't fire himself as well.

Yea for parity: Super Bowl XXXVII marked the fourth straight year that an NFL franchise won its first Super Bowl.

If John Madden really had it as an analyst, he would have advised Rich Gannon to kill the clock on their final drive. I mean, look what happened.

Good for you, Al Michaels. Here's hoping Madden never lives down last year.

Ye Gods. Cars burning. Public drunkenness. And their guys lost.

When the fires die down and they aren't buzzed anymore, Raider Nation goes home to their mommies and watch daytime cartoons until training camp in August. That's why what happened Sunday night happened.

Speaking of fans, was anyone in Qualcomm Stadium actually rooting for Tampa Bay?

Pitchers and catchers report in about a month.

Usually, that should make you want to rip off your snorkel jacket and lay out in the sun for five hours. But if that instead brings either scorn, depression or both, fear not.

There's always the draft.

And our new draft guru, Ray Faustina. Listen to this guy, folks.

And begin dreaming of Super Bowl XXXVIII, and getting it back.