TheGodInAGreyHoodie

Florham Park, NY (FNN) - The stunning loss of the New York Jets to the Miami Dolphins actually catapulted the Jets to legitimacy.

Going into this weeks match up the biggest and most common knock on the Jets was the fact only one of the teams they had beaten all season long had a winning record. Had the Jets won they still would have only beaten one team with a winning record. However with the win by Miami, the Dolphins improving the Dolphins record to 7-6, making the Jets win over the Dolphins in week 3 all that more impressive than it would have been if the Dolphins were only 6-7.

In the locker room after the game head coach Rex Ryan congratulated the team on improving their record over winning teams and then announced snack time. Sal Alosi was awarded the game ball after leading the team in tackles in the game.

Mark Sanchez said he was "proud to do my part to make this happen."

(I wrote it in the style of an Onion piece, hope you like it)

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Citing the Bible as proof of God is like citing comic books to prove the existence of Superman.

NEGoldenAge

Nicely done.

Haley

Haha, nice one

CampPen33

Goooood, goooooooooooood....

Nikolai

Pretty clever.


And hey, it improved our position in the quality standings as well.

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We get what we deserve.

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“On a day when they could have had impact players David Terrell or Koren Robinson..they took Georgia defensive tackle Richard Seymour, who had 1 sacks last season in the pass-happy SEC and is too tall to play tackle at 6-6 and too slow to play defensive end. This genius move was followed by trading out of a spot where they could have gotten the last decent receiver in Robert Ferguson and settled for tackle Matt Light, who will not help any time soon.”

Pat the Pats Fan

well done, scarcasm is always appreciated, especially when discussing the JEST.

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A sarcastic Bill Belichick on Tom Brady's finger injury, "It's not life threatening."

Krugman

He he he.Like the Alosi tackle line the best.....

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In Belichick we trust....
"Crush your enemies,see them driven before you,hear the lamentation of the women." Arnold Schwartzenegger doing his BB impression.

terabthia2

Very well done, sir!

Though like alot of things IRL, the Onion can barely stay ahead of the satire curve. For example, I wouldn't put it past some dumb desperate Jets fans to go that route and actually take some of that "logic" seriously!

TheGodInAGreyHoodie

The greatest satire piece I ever read was written in 2001. The site no longer exists.

Shortly after 9/11, folks were clamoring for more information regarding how much of a threat existed or how safe we were. This site wrote a hilarious piece on the government announcing a color coded system to tell us how much danger there was from terrorism.

About two weeks later the DHS announced such a plan.

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Citing the Bible as proof of God is like citing comic books to prove the existence of Superman.

MassPats38

Good stuff!