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Old 03-19-2009, 09:40 PM   #1
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Default Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
2013: Emmitt on the Brink - A fictional look at the 2013 New England Patriots and Emmitt Smith

Quote:
The premise: Coming off a Super Bowl victory, the Patriots open the 2013 season with a blowout win. Unfortunately, they get into trouble for Spygate II. As punishment, Roger Goodell orders the Patriots to fire Bill Belichick and replace him with Emmitt Smith.

This is a weekly feature that will take a newspaper reporter's perspective and follow the 2013 New England Patriots as they traverse the 2013 NFL season under Emmitt's guidance.
Very funny stuff.
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Old 03-20-2009, 12:08 AM   #2
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
smoke what?
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Old 03-20-2009, 01:06 AM   #3
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
Even for an absurdist take, that was just weird, hahaha.
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Old 03-20-2009, 01:08 AM   #4
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
"I couldn't strip the Patriots of their Super Bowls because I didn't want to deal with a lawsuit, and fining Mr. Kraft wouldn't do any good because he's a billionaire who only spends his money on roast beef sandwiches," Goodell explained.

I found that hilarious for some reason.
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Old 03-20-2009, 01:32 AM   #5
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
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Originally Posted by Patjew View Post
"I couldn't strip the Patriots of their Super Bowls because I didn't want to deal with a lawsuit, and fining Mr. Kraft wouldn't do any good because he's a billionaire who only spends his money on roast beef sandwiches," Goodell explained.

I found that hilarious for some reason.
Yea Roast Beef pfffft. We all know he loves the lobster rolls down at the markets.
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Old 03-20-2009, 07:44 AM   #6
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
Eric Mangini for the Jets? It's a bit outdated already...
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:30 AM   #7
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How can anyone possibly have that much time on their hands in THIS economy?
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:32 AM   #8
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Default Re: Comedy: Emmitt Smith's 2013 Patriots chronicle
That site blowed me out
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Old 03-20-2009, 10:11 PM   #9
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When the Bengals take the field on Sunday, they won't have No. 2 receiver Chris Henry, who was suspended for the 17th time in his NFL career on Tuesday.

This time, Henry might not be coming back to the league. Henry is being accused of providing alcohol to an unborn baby.
Oh my god. Hahahahaha
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Old 03-20-2009, 10:46 PM   #10
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Upon hearing this, Roger Goodell fined the Patriots $500 million and announced that the Lions would decide where this game would be played.

That would mean Ford Field, right? Well, Lions general manager Matt Millen had something else in mind. Millen announced that with William Clay Ford's approval, this would be the first game in NFL history to be played online.
This stuff is awesome.
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