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Discussion in 'The PatsFans.com Pub' started by Terry Glenn is a cowgirl, Mar 31, 2007.

  1. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

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    Happy and Sad
    A man says to his wife "Say something to me that will make me both happy and sad at the same time" the wife replies "You have a much bigger d!ck than your brother".
     
  2. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

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    Blonde Logic
    Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?"
    The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"
     
  3. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

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    Car Trouble
    A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
    After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
    She says, "What's the story?"
    He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
    She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2007
  4. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

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    Blonde on the Sun
    A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
    The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
    The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
    The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
    To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2007
  5. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

    Joined:
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    In a Vacuum
    A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
    She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2007
  6. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

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    Dogs
    A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
    The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
    Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
    "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2007
  7. Terry Glenn is a cowgirl

    Terry Glenn is a cowgirl Banned

    Joined:
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    Blondeback Mountain...
    A blonde decides to try horseback riding, despite having had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.
    Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to
    safety. Unfortunately for the blonde, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup and is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. Her head is battered against the ground, mere moments away from unconsciousness when...
    Stan the Walmart manager runs out to shut the horse off.
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2007

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