Any tips on consoling a young Pats fan?

FreeCourtroomBrady · Jan 5, 2020

I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

catent · Jan 5, 2020

He’s 9 - the intense emotional reaction is to be expected. He’ll be fine in no time, ironically, also as a product of his age.

I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Part of life is learning that sometimes you experience uncomfortable emotions and there’s not a lot you can do about it.

If he’s still an emotional wreck come the end of this week then I’d be a bit more concerned.

I got really hooked in 2007, when I was 12 - so I’ve seen both ends of it: losing as a younger person and as an adult. You obviously process things differently based on your age. As a kid, I was more up/down, as an adult it still stings like hell but I’m a bit more steady. It’s going to suck either way, but most well-adjusted people (kids or adults) should be fine after 3-4 days, a week tops.

Ring 6 · Jan 5, 2020

FreeCourtroomBrady said:
I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

What do you do when he loses a little league game it strikes out a few times?
It’s a game, he was upset today, tomorrow he moves on and you remind him of the success and no team wins every year.
My son was 9 for the 2007 season and really became a fan them. He (we) lost it when the game ended and I had to explain to him it’s just a game, we’ll be back etc etc. helped me deal with it.

lancerman · Jan 5, 2020

Sbow him this board and tell him he's going to grow up to be like some of the yokels here if he doesn't stop crying

Viper652 · Jan 5, 2020

It's also a testament to how spoiled you can be from this franchise, no matter what age.

FreeCourtroomBrady · Jan 5, 2020

That’s the thing, I’ve seen him get upset when he strikes out, when he loses at other things but I’ve never seen him get so upset after a loss. The worst part is he has absolutely no control over the Patriots whereas everything else in life he has some relative control to his successes and failures. It’s like he placed his worth, value and identity in a football team.

catent · Jan 5, 2020

Viper652 said:
It's also a testament to how spoiled you can be from this franchise, no matter what age.

I mean the kid is 9 years old, man. Some intense emotions are to be expected whether it was the Patriots or not. He doesn’t even realize what the dynasty really is because he’s only been alive for half of it - I doubt he’s sentimental; just bummed because they lost and he is super into them.

Doesn’t make sense to call him spoiled when he’s a kid who’s bummed about a sports game. Something most of us experienced whether we remember it or not.

fightingirish595 · Jan 5, 2020

Viper652 said:
It's also a testament to how spoiled you can be from this franchise, no matter what age.

this. When I was 10 we lost in Denver and it killed our chance at a 3 peat. By then I had seen and remembered 3 superbowls and no playoff losses. Brady and Belli were 10-0. I felt entitled like we were invincible and couldn’t lose. Not gonna lie I cried a little. Think I might of cried a little the next year after the colts loss too. But after the giants loss in 07 I didn’t. At some point you gotta come of age

hopefully this kid will be over it by tomorrow and living life

catent · Jan 5, 2020

FreeCourtroomBrady said:
That’s the thing, I’ve seen him get upset when he strikes out, when he loses at other things but I’ve never seen him get so upset after a loss. The worst part is he has absolutely no control over the Patriots whereas everything else in life he has some relative control to his successes and failures. It’s like he placed his worth, value and identity in a football team.

I can relate to this. I take the loss of teams I support a lot harder than I do losses I personally participated in.

It’s completely irrational but I don’t think it’s at all uncommon.

Ring 6 · Jan 5, 2020

FreeCourtroomBrady said:
That’s the thing, I’ve seen him get upset when he strikes out, when he loses at other things but I’ve never seen him get so upset after a loss. The worst part is he has absolutely no control over the Patriots whereas everything else in life he has some relative control to his successes and failures. It’s like he placed his worth, value and identity in a football team.

He will be over it by Monday.

pheenix11 · Jan 5, 2020

My son is 10 and all he has known is Patriots dominance. The loss to the Eagles was a bit of a wake up call to him. Playing flag football and losing games has been an eye opener as well.

Losing is part of life. It happens to everyone. Losers let it destroy them, winners pick themselves back up and keep fighting.

My son is bitter tonight and I told him the same thing I said after the Eagles loss. In the end, it’s a game and it really doesn’t affect our life. It’s fun when they win but you have to take the bad with the good.

I never experienced a championship until I was 28. He’s 10 and already had three. Those memories will last a lifetime and are the ones that will stick.

Just be thankful they don’t have to experience the complete and unending misery of being a Jets fan.

HeadHunter · Jan 5, 2020

Aw poor lil dude. He will be fine, I’d just let him deal with it. Shoot when I was in my very early twenties and we lost in 06 and 07 I was devastated. Probably more than I should have been. Remember fan is short for fanatic, as he gets older he will learn to deal with it. Let him do his thing. I personally don’t think it’s a bad thing to be passionate about something in life, even if it is just a game.

scott99 · Jan 5, 2020

It’s tough, especially for young kids. I was really bad with losses until I was around 21. It’s a tough lesson, but it’s a good lesson to learn at a young age. It’s just sports, it’s not life. I know it sounds simple, and it’s tough for young folks. I remember the 1976 playoff loss to the Raiders, I was 14 and so upset. Had first become a Pat’s fan a year earlier in 1975. But really was invested in that 1976 team.

supafly · Jan 5, 2020

Forget the young fan. Any tips on consoling me?

Bobs My Uncle · Jan 5, 2020

Show him highlight's of the early 70's and 90'd Pats teams and make sure he knows that's how it used to be for some of us. ;-)

Tunescribe · Jan 5, 2020

FreeCourtroomBrady said:
I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

Tell him that losing and disappointment are part of life and feeling bad about it is OK. But whether you won or lost is over now and what lies ahead is all that matters. The Patriots will be back next year with more wins to look forward to and celebrate.

Canuck · Jan 5, 2020

Even some players cry after a tough loss in the playoffs. It's normal behavior. Now if he starts saying that the only way the Titans won was because they cheated, then I would start to worry. That's a condition that can't be cured and seems to last a lifetime.

catent · Jan 5, 2020

Also, he’s 9 years old so I doubt this is an issue, but make sure he has plenty of other outlets in life.

If the outcome of games that one has zero control over becomes what dictates one’s wellbeing, you’re in a bad way. You need other aspects your life that brings joy, but more importantly, *purpose*.

Something I’ve struggled with as it relates to the Patriots, but I doubt a 9 year old really faces that.

Deus Irae · Jan 5, 2020

He's too young for a hooker, so how about a case of good beer and a pack of smokes?

stephens44 · Jan 5, 2020

FreeCourtroomBrady said:
I have a 9 year old who got into the Patriots pretty hard this year. He went from 0-60 in week 1 and hasn’t stopped since. He gets made fun of in school for being a Pats fan (we don’t live here). He has grown up with the Patriots going to Super Bowls non stop and now it’s his expectation in his 9 years old mind. He literally cried himself to sleep and as a father it’s really hard to tell a 9 year old it’s just a game and not to get so emotionally invested (even though some of you are worse). I tried to tell him if you place your happiness in a sports team you will always be disappointed except for that “1 out of 32” chance they win it all. He’s attached himself to this team and I don’t know how to make him see reason. Do I just let him get over it? Do we spend tomorrow watching New England Super Bowl DVDs? Do I cut him off from the NFL entirely until next year? Any fathers (or mothers) out there got some good tips?

Introduce him to the draft, get him interested in the national championship trying to figure out who would help the Pats. Its also a great lead in to looking at colleges and starting that conversation EARLY. Good luck!

Any tips on consoling a young Pats fan?

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