November 09, 2003
Mrs. Rousseau's Bye Week Guest Column
BY: Kevin Rousseau
Editor's note: As a public service to the regular readers of Kevin's column, once a year during the Patriots bye week, his wife gets to say her peace. The lovely and talented Mrs. Rousseau somehow manages to put up with him and this is her only outlet. So please, lend her your ear.
OK, Here I go:
The edict came down that we are going to have a Super Bowl party last year. So….I drive an hour and a half to Portland to find a party supply store that had the official Super Bowl XXXVII paper plates and napkins for the party. Oh, if you need any blue or yellow paper napkins or streamers, let me know. We still haven't run out of them.
A few weekly newspapers get duped into picking up his weekly column and the next thing you know, he thinks he's Will McDonough.
Even worse, a sports radio station is somehow convinced by him that he is some kind of "expert" and gives him a weekly soap box to stand on. Again, I'm honored to be married with the second coming of Gil Santos.
He now thinks that the 1970's Sunoco Patriot glasses have become old and rare enough to have earned a place in my china cabinet.
Our poor dog Timber now won't come into the living room during bad stretches of a Patriots game.
Let me set this up for you. I'm asleep after working a twelve-hour day. The Patriots (or the Red Sox for that matter) seem to start these games at God-awful hours. Consequently, this means I'm awoken to the verbage of a late-night celebration or venting coming from the living room. "Rousseau, party-for-one. Your table is ready."
Oh, you'll love this one. I'm honored to be offered the opportunity to go to a game with him in August. You all know what this means. Apparently, I'm not high enough up on the backup list for the regular season. His excuse is "it's too cold for you in December." I guess I'll never find out.
Throwback apparel continues to be an issue. The latest is the hint about how the new Gino Cappelletti throwback jersey would make the perfect holiday gift.
The only time we can have a "getaway" weekend in the fall is during the bye week. Great. Prince Edward Island is lovely in November.
Like throwback apparel, the bobblehead collection continues to be a problem. I don't mind the Tom Brady bobblehead, but the Surfer Boy from Super Bowl XXXVII has got to go.
We pay (more like I pay, in all honesty) $42.95 per month for cable television. Seems to me like an awful lot for four stations-ESPN, ESPN2, NESN, and Fox Sports New England.
Last Saturday night, our "romantic" evening out together was interrupted by having to stop by our local Kmart to "run in for a quick second." Turns out he had to see if any new football cards had come in.
Apparently, being a football "columnist" gives him the authority to watch any football game for "research purposes" at anytime regardless of whether or not I might enjoy a non-sports related program.
I'm still dusting around the Wilson authentic Super Bowl XXXVI football that graces the top of our entertainment center. The orange kicking tee that it sits on goes so well with the rest of my décor.
. I've said my peace for another year. Thanks for reading. I'm already looking forward to next year's bye week.
If you still care to contact my husband after you've read this, he can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Oh, and please don't forget to check him out at 8:20 on Monday mornings on Bangor, Maine's sports radio leader, WZON 620 "The Zone." You can listen over the internet at www.zoneradio.com
And despite their better judgment, this column also appears in the Waterboro (ME) Reporter, the Maine Standard Times (Lewiston/Auburn, ME), and the Lakes Region Suburban Weekly(Windham, ME).
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