Tings to do when bored shoping with wife

Discussion in 'The PatsFans.com Pub' started by PatsWickedPissah, Nov 30, 2006.

  1. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

    Feb 10, 2005
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    Disable Jersey

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute

    3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code
    3' in housewares.. and watched what happened.

    5. Aug. 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on

    6. Sept 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

    7. Sept 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

    8. Sept 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and
    asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

    9. Oct. 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and
    picked his nose.

    10. Nov. 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk
    if he knows where to find the antidepressants.

    11. Dec 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission
    Impossible" theme .

    12. Dec 6: In the auto department, practised his "Madonna look" using
    different size funnels.

    13. Dec 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled
    "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

    14. Dec 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the
    fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

    15. Dec 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door waited awhile, then
    yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
  2. Clonamery

    Clonamery PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

    Feb 23, 2005
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    +360 / 3 / -2

    Number 6, that was you? I walked around and felt that carpet for an hour.

    Number 11, done that many times in my life. Also, try imitating Bluto from 'Animal House' when they break into Dean Wormer's office with the white horse. Bluto (Belushi) hops around and then up the stairs.....people at the mall love it.
  3. sdaniels7114

    sdaniels7114 Experienced Starter w/First Big Contract

    Jan 2, 2006
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    +7 / 0 / -0

    That's one determined wife you've got there, PWP. I can't think of a single woman I've ever met who'd have held out past #9.
  4. fleabassist1

    fleabassist1 In the Starting Line-Up

    Dec 17, 2005
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    +5 / 0 / -0

    #12 Jersey

    I think i'v pretty much done every single one of those at wallmart, in some way or another.
  5. shirtsleeve

    shirtsleeve In the Starting Line-Up

    Nov 20, 2005
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    +0 / 0 / -0

    Ya know, I was miserably wed to an obsessive compulsive shopper for many years. Gladly, those days have ended and I now find myself with someone much more "balanced". About the only things I did was start all the animatronics in the seasonal departments, make all the alarm clocks go off at once, insisted on trying on womens underthings in the ladies fitting room, and to pick things up, kinda hide them near my body and put them down elsewhere. The rest of the day I would play keep away from store security. Yours are so much more creative! My hats of and my sympathies!

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