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Obama To Make Reassuring Eye Contact

Discussion in 'Political Discussion' started by IcyPatriot, Jun 9, 2010.

  1. IcyPatriot

    IcyPatriot ------------- PatsFans.com Supporter

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    #87 Jersey

    [​IMG]
    http://www.theonion.com/articles/obama-to-make-reassuring-eye-contact-with-every-la,17574/

    Last edited: Jun 9, 2010
  2. KontradictioN

    KontradictioN Do you even lift? PatsFans.com Supporter

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    :rofl: Wow. That was the best article from The Onion in a while.
  3. IcyPatriot

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    ..................
  4. Harry Boy

    Harry Boy Look Up, It's Amazing PatsFans.com Supporter

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    As I was sitting quietly by my campfire I suddenly felt an overwhelming thrill in my spleen as though an unseen godly presence was caressing my whole being, I slowly turned to my right and there he was, my legs were uncontrollably slamming up and down on the ground, I became sexually aroused, saliva ran down the side of my chin onto my neck and adams apple area, I had two rapid bowel movements, good Jesus God it was him, America’s First Messiah, his beautiful Teeth glistened in the firelight, I could see the outlines of his extraordinary Ears they looked like little “frying pans” as he stood between his two glorious teleprompters I couldn’t help but notice his gorgeous feet, the toes bent inwards “dink toe” he stood in shirtsleeves which made it appear that was about to perform some really serious sh!t, I was crying, I pis$ed my pants again, my wife heard me moaning she yelled out of the window “you moron what the hell are you doing out there” I screamed back “shut the window and mind your own f-cking business” it was then that this great man spoke, he said “sit down Harry and gaze into my eyes for I am the savior, I am The Man, one only has to look at my handsome face, my feet and my Mickey Mouse Ears to know that salvation is at hand, those who gaze into my eyes shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever, my father had 312 illegitimate children, my aunt was an illegal alien, I have a brother who lives in a Grass Hut, my brother George smokes dope with an Ivory Bong, I also have a brother Samson who is a well known Child Molester, all these family attributes played a great roll in my being raised to sainthood in the United States Of America, holy sh!t Harry, look into my eyes, oh God somebody stop me, now I know everything will be fine for he has given me hope, he is The Great One, Messiah Baracko Hussein Obuma.

    Oh it's crying time again your gonna leave me
    I can see that far away look in your eyes
    I can tell by the way you hold me darling
    That it won't be long before its crying time
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2010
  5. Leave No Doubt

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  6. Harry Boy

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