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Notes To Pats Fans Attending Monday's Jets Game

Discussion in 'PatsFans.com - Patriots Fan Forum' started by PatsWickedPissah, Dec 21, 2005.

  1. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    Some helpfull tips & observations...

    1. As you drive through NYC looking for the Jets stadium, keep going.
    You need to continue west, crossing a rather large sewage canal into
    yet another godforsaken state. The stadium is located in New Jersey,
    in the beautiful town of Hackensack. It's not really the Jets' stadium
    but that's too long of a sad story.

    2. One caveat, do not, I repeat DO NOT wear a Pennington jersey in that
    stadium. You have been warned for your safety.

    3. No alcohol will be served in the stadium monday, but that is not a
    problem. Jets fans are by intrinsic nature loud and obnoxious
    creatures and their basic behaviour remains unaffected by consuming
    mass quantities. You'll miss none of the local color you came to see.

    4. The coach Herm Edwards. The following analogy will help Patriots
    fans. Known as the 'black Pete Carroll' he has a similar penchant for
    going easy on the players and tolerating repeated failure. He stands on
    the sidelines during games with a similar bewildered "I can't believe
    I'm seeing this" look on his face.

    5. As to coaching style, you'll be amused and entertained if there is
    any need whatsoever for clock management during the game. Herm and the
    clock is always a classic. Stay alert.

    6. Players to watch include John Abraham their pass rushing DE. He'll
    be facing 2nd team Pats OTs and should be fun to watch, that is
    assuming he does not get another vicious attack of menstrual cramps and
    sit out the game. This is unlikely because he's playing for a contract
    and may actually give a decent effort.

    7. Couple years ago the Jets traded up giving multiple picks for a DT
    known as the BBWK, Bowling Ball With Knives. He's since played in
    obscurity and mediocrity but last game he came right up the middle and
    sacked Brady. To his credit, he did not use any knives on Brady that
    play. His matchup against the Pats 3rd team OC will be interesting.

    8. Say Hi to Jonathan Vilma, their talented, young, mouthy MLB. Tell him
    not to quit his day job and go into the prognosticating business.

    9. Contrary to rumor, not all women at Jets games are strippers and
    prostitutes. Treat any women you meet with respect, even when they're
    harrassing you for money.

    10. After the obligatory Patriots victory, go against your nature and
    comport yourselves with class. Maybe you can finally get that beer at
    a Jets post game tailgate.

    11. If your 12 year old can throw a football over 15 yards, please ask
    for a man called Bradway as you exit the stadium. Big bucks could be
    yours.
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2005
  2. T-ShirtDynasty

    T-ShirtDynasty Moderator

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    :rofl:

    Herm and the clock is always a classic. THAT's classic.
     
  3. mikey

    mikey In the Starting Line-Up

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    Instead of driving through the "large sewage canal", you can take I95 South through the George Washington Bridge and then take the Route 17 South to the Meadowlands. (Warning: If you have less than 4 occupants per car, NYC will not allow you to drive through the City due to the transit strike.)

    The Giants Stadium is not located in the "beautiful town of Hackensack". It is located in the town of "East Rutherford".

    The "godforsaken state" of New Jersey has the second highest per-capita income in the nation, with a median home value in excess of half a million dollars.


    .
     
  4. mikey

    mikey In the Starting Line-Up

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    New Jersey and Bergen County folks are some of the wealthiest and most educated people in the country.

    The prohibition of alcohol is to make the football game more enjoyable and family friendly for both the parents and children who are visiting Manhattan for the holidays.


    .
     
  5. Gumby

    Gumby 2nd Team Getting Their First Start

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    #11 Jersey

    Very understandable. And here all along I thought it was to prevent the jester faithful from peeing in the aisles after wallowing in despair and depression at the 35th incarnation of an epic disaster of a season and resorting to excessive alcohol to numb themselves into a stupor.
     
  6. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    I suppose you'll be telling me next that the women aren't all hookers and strippers?

    Please. You cannot be taking anything in that post seriously, can you?
     
  7. shmessy

    shmessy Maude Staff Member PatsFans.com Supporter

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    #75 Jersey

    Hilarious stuff, PWP!!!

    I can only add: "If you're wearing Pats clothing - stay the hell out of that long raised tunnel bridge contraption in the parking lot. It's like going through a big sewer pipe with thousands of angry bees - and you're wearing honey-coated longjohns".
     
  8. PatsFanInEaglesLand

    PatsFanInEaglesLand In the Starting Line-Up

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    #37 Jersey

    Take a joke, New York LOVER!
     
  9. oldrover

    oldrover 2nd Team Getting Their First Start

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    #50 Jersey

    Drinking would be the only way at this game to enjoy yourself.
     
  10. PatsFanInEaglesLand

    PatsFanInEaglesLand In the Starting Line-Up

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    #37 Jersey

    Well now that we know he is a Jet fan, his post make perfect sense now.
     
  11. denverpatsfan

    denverpatsfan PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    Exit 16W

    Don't worry about the beer ban. Those fans are notorious for sneaking in large quantities of beer into the stadium.

    Failing that there is the other option of smoking some of those "special" cigarettes. You will smell the aroma wafting from some of the concourses and ramps at the stadium.

    And yes North Jersey does suck. NJ also has the highest taxes in the country.

    The fans were not that mean believe it or not. I was treated OK during the 2 Pats games I attended there. The Pats lost both so that could be part of the reason.

    Anyway have fun if you are going.
     
  12. T-ShirtDynasty

    T-ShirtDynasty Moderator

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    :rofl: You wanna see funny? Check out the reaction this post gets over on JetsInisder. It went over like the proverbial fart in church. :D Some actually appreciated the humor, but some were pushed to the brink of sanity so much that they had to resort to claiming our QB has female genitalia, and even question our own PatsWickedPissah's sexual preference!
     
  13. upstater1

    upstater1 Pro Bowl Player

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    Loud Jets fans? Where? Two years ago I was at the Jets-Pats game at the Meadowdump right around Xmas time. The place was a morgue.
     
  14. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    Yes, somehow many failed to see the (attempt at) humor. See for yourself...

    http://www.jetsinsider.net/forums/showthread.php?t=105977

    -pwp (casting my pearls before swine)
     
  15. denverpatsfan

    denverpatsfan PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    Wow

    Great job there stirring up the bee's nest. What profanity on that board!? A bunch of stereotypical ignorant New Yorkers with the exception of a few with a sense of humor.

    Great Post!
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2005
  16. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    Oh, lest I forget, I added these three pointers over at Jets Insidah...

    10. A bit of history here. Although the Jets have never won an official NFL Championship of any kind, they did once win an inter-league exhibition game in the late 60s, long before Neil Armstrong landed on the moon. Really, they did. Ask your grandfather.

    11. Speaking of that game, if an ugly elderly besotted male grabs your wife or girlfriend and tries to kiss her, it's the QB from that game.

    12. Local culture. As the game wears on, you'll here folks chanting J...E...T...S! Join in, every December it stands for 'Just End The Season'.
     
  17. shmessy

    shmessy Maude Staff Member PatsFans.com Supporter

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    #75 Jersey

    Too funny. I just read the link - it seems like a cesspool of ill will over there - a transit strike will do that to people.

    BTW, if you take his arms, I'll take his legs, we can carry PatSummerallofthe80's over there and feed him to the lions!
     
  18. Mike the Brit

    Mike the Brit Minuteman Target PatsFans.com Supporter

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    My goodness, it must have been a tough season for the Jets -- I feel sorry for them (I hope it'll be a few seasons before the Pats are back there again).

    Great job, nevertheless -- 11 and 12 are too funny for words!
     
  19. PatsFanInEaglesLand

    PatsFanInEaglesLand In the Starting Line-Up

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    #37 Jersey

    I almost forgot about John Rocker and what he said, I wouldn't go as far as to say he was 100% correct, but NY is a cesspool. And northern Jersey is a big chemical dump that I swear produces mutants.

    As for "JetBabe" I bet she is the big fat slob sports babe that used to do radio.
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2005
  20. PatsWickedPissah

    PatsWickedPissah PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    No she's not that old, fat skank; just another younger one.
     

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