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New Stock Market Terms

Discussion in 'Political Discussion' started by Holy Diver, Oct 7, 2008.

  1. Holy Diver

    Holy Diver Rookie

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    Ahhh....a litlle humor in this rotting, sinking, dark economy......

    NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS Desertpeace

    CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer.
    CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer.
    BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
    BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
    VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower.
    P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
    BROKER — What my broker has made me.
    STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell.
    STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
    STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
    FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
    MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks.
    CASH FLOW– The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
    YAHOO — What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
    WINDOWS — What you jump out of when you’re the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.
    INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse.
    PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use.
  2. reflexblue

    reflexblue PatsFans.com Supporter PatsFans.com Supporter

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    #91 Jersey

    I never voted on a thread rep. until now. And I can count to FIVE.

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