NEM's First Post

[Lloyd_Christmas]

In another thread, someone asked NEM about his first post and he replied

My first post was chiseled on the walls of my cave.

Enter your best guess here, what was NEM's first post?

 

[Boston Tim]

Enter your best guess here, was NEM's first post?

That's easy. I'll bet he said something to the effect of "Charlie Weis sucks."

 

[patchick]

Nah, it was a critique of Prescott Bush.

 

[QuiGon]

Enter your best guess here, what was NEM's first post?

He probably talked about how evil Ronald Reagan was and how Reagan was leading us headfirst into nuclear annihilation resulting in 200 years of Soviet dominance over the world.

 

[Tunescribe]

It was probably something like, "Finally, after all these years, I have found something to give my life meaning and context."

 

[GoWhalers]

I'm pretty new here, but I'll wager dollars to donuts that his first post was a 30-page monologue on a new play he had drawn up called the "inside slant".

 

[PATSNUTme]

Hi. I'm NEM and I'm new to the board and the board is new to the internet. I'll tell you about myself but there is not enough computer space here yet,so I'll wait and tell everyone who joins.

I know more about everything than anyone else. If anyone of you dare to call me a Newbie I will have you banned.

Wait, there is no one else here.

So, I'm right and it is now documented and fact, end of story.

PS

I remember when Jim Thorpe and Red Grange came to Boston to ask me advise. I told them to learn to run slants.

 

[Lloyd_Christmas]

How about:

"I was down at the stream the other day and Nenauh's sister's cousin's tribal shaman was saying that he spotted the herd of buffalo on the East side of the mountains"

or

"This tribal chief has no idea of how to hunt Antelope... he always sends the spear throwers to the outside of the field instead of attacking the middle... you got to attack the middle!"

or

"Your theory of making spear tips out of flint rock is interesting, but all wet. I know more about making spear tips than any of you ever will. I've been making spear tips for over 60 years. Someday when you grow older you will understand some of this. Have a nice fortnight!"

 

[Tunescribe]

How about:

"I was down at the stream the other day and Nenauh's sister's cousin's tribal shaman was saying that he spotted the herd of buffalo on the East side of the mountains"

or

"This tribal chief has no idea of how to hunt Antelope... he always sends the spear throwers to the outside of the field instead of attacking the middle... you got to attack the middle more!"

... regardless of what he said, if it was a rant, it had to end with this:

"Have a nice fortnight!"

I think you're on the right track, but I'd substitute woolly mammoth for antelope.

 

[primetime]

Unfortunately, since the search only shows the last 500 posts, we'll never know. And since NEM's last 500 posts have all been made within the last 3 days, that doesn't do much for us.

 

[nescott]

I think it has somthing do do with GET RID OF THIS OFF CORDINATIOR WHAT A PIECE OF ****.

 

[RoadGrader]

Actual printout of NEM's first post attempted before the Internet was invented.

the post attempt was written in Fortran and is as timely now as it was back then

 

[shmessy]

"There's NO WAY Babe Parilli makes the team!"

 

[Patters]

 

[RayClay]

A picture of a Buffalo.. No a Bill, Cookie gilchrist!

 

[mikey]

George Bush sucks.




.

 

[Flying Fungi]

Nah, it was a critique of Prescott Bush.

nicely done--before even opening the thread i was thinking it was going to be a roasting of the whigs and tories...

 

[Box_O_Rocks]

nicely done--before even opening the thread i was thinking it was going to be a roasting of the whigs and tories...

Roasting was pretty close to my first reaction: "Freezing my ***** off in this cave since floating to shore with the seal bladder. Haven't seen Weis-wun since he yelled at me for starting a sun flower in the boat. Who knew walrus hide split when scorched? Nearly sh-ee-it myself to death after eating the spoiled grapes outside. I call this place 'Vine' since you can't take a step without tripping over the walrus kissing things."

 

[T-ShirtDynasty]

George Bush sucks.

Come on, George Bush wasn't even a twinkle in his ancestors' eyes when NEM started diagraming the patented 'No-fly/go-routes-all-slants/crossing-patterns-from-the-no-huddle' Offense on his trusty stone tablets. (Little known fact that it was actually his buddy Moses that was obsessed with the no-huddle and convinced NEM to embrace it after scaring the snot out of him with some weird trick with the big walking stick they used to draw up plays in the sand.)

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Link for those with images turned off

 

[RayClay]

Come on, George Bush wasn't even a twinkle in his ancestors' eyes when NEM started diagraming the patented 'No-fly/go-routes-all-slants/crossing-patterns-from-the-no-huddle' Offense on his trusty stone tablets. (Little known fact that it was actually his buddy Moses that was obsessed with the no-huddle and convinced NEM to embrace it after scaring the snot out of him with some weird trick with the big walking stick they used to draw up plays in the sand.)

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Link for those with images turned off

Poster of the year award for this!, (I know there isn't one but there should be).

How did you do that T-Shirt?