Belichick, Superstar

[PatsFanInVa]

Screw Ender's Game....

The Love of the Game
(Sung to the tune of "Blood Money")

[NFL COMPETITION COMMITTEE: FISCHICUS, DUNGYASS, RANDOMUS. ENTER JUDAS MANGINA]

FISHICUS:
Cut your protesting, we all have been losers
We want information, Get up off the field

RANDOMUS
Get us the tapes that we need to arrest him

DUNGYASS:
You know his movements, Goodell has the Shield


FISHICUS:
Point us to who has the questionable camera
Back of the endzone? The first level rail?

RANDOMUS:
We just need to know where security can find him

DUNGYASS:
With media around him - then we can't fail



MANGINA:
I don't want to keep losing

FISHICUS
Neither do we; that's the point of this thing

MANGINA
I just want to start winning

DUNGYASS
It isn't hypocrisy, you just want a ring



FISHICUS
Think of the way they'll perceive you in Brooklyn

DUNGYASS
Preen for the media, pretend you're not lame

FISCHICUS
And not only that, you may win the division

DUNGYASS
It isn't for you, it's for the love of the
love of the
love of the game

JUDAS MANGINA
On Sunday Night
You'll find this guy Estrella
before the crowds
On the sidelines of the Meadowlands

COMPETITION COMMITTEE
Well done JUDAS
Poor old JUDAS

 

[PatsFanInVa]

Gotta go to work... sort of wanted to get to where I had Easterbrook, the whole ESPN cast, Tomase, various other supernumary media in a chorus saying

Hosannah hey sannah sanna sanna ho
Sanna hey sanna ho and how
Hey BB, BB, please explain to me
You had everything where is it now?

Or better yet...

Take him to Specter! Take him to Specter!

SPECTER
"And so the coach,
Is finally my guest
And why is this?
Was Roger unimpressed?

FANS
We'll need Comcast
To smack the NFL
They have no rule
To keep a team in hell...
We want him crucified
It's all you have to do
We need him crucified
It's all you have to do

SPECTER
Talk to me, Belichick!
You have been brought here
randomly slandered by your own papers
Do you have the first idea why you deserve it?
Tell me King of the League
Where is your Kingdom?
Look at me, am I a fan?

BELICHICK
I have got no comment unless you have a question

SPECTER
But you're a king

BELICHICK
I'm in the coaching biz
We have a game. It is what it is.

SPECTER
But what is "is"? Is this a Clinton thing?

BELICHICK
That's for you guys. I just want a ring.

FANS
Crucify him crucify him!
Remember Comcast
You have a duty
To crush the League so crucify him!
Remember Comcast
You have a duty
To crush the League so crucify him!

SPECTER
Give me a minute
Give me a camera
There's nothing new so I need to ask more questions
Give me some leverage
Dirt on Estrella
There's nothing new I need some ammunition

FANS
Crucify him crucify him!....
--------------------------------------

Okay REALLY need to get to work now that dadbum andrew dice webber makin me all late n such rashem frashem...

 

[363839]

That was just ingenious. I loved it, PatsfaninVA.
I've always loved JCSuperstar.
Just ingenious. Great job!
I want more.
I particularly liked BB's second reply to specter.
"It is what it is" LOL! Perfect fit.

 

[PatsFanInVa]

okay just a little more then I GOTTA go...

SPECTER
Where are you from, BB?
What do you want, BB?
Tell, tell
I really don't care if
I get to suspend you
I want the NFL, L
How can you not speak when your legacy's in my hands?
How can you stay quiet, I don't believe you understand

BELICHICK
You have nothing in your hands
Any power you have
Comes to you from cable shills
It is what it is, and I can't change it

SPECTER
You're a fool Belichick

MEDIA/FANS
Crucify him crucify him
Remember Comcast
You have a duty
To crush the league so crucify him
Remember Comcast
You have a duty
To crush the league so crucify him

SPECTER
Don't let me stop
Your self-non-induction
In the Hall of Fame
You misguided Martyr
I'll get my hands
On that anti-trust exemption
Coach if you want to
Your league'll have no charter...

(CUE BRASS "Belichick Superstar" THEME RIFF)

 

[363839]

Great stuff. Thanks PatsFanInVa.
You made that up in the time between your last post?
Damn. Very impressive.:rocker:

 

[Pats726]

Lol.....great!!!

 

[BadMoFo]

Nerd. Nerd. Nerd. Nerd!

 

[Kontradiction]

Brilliance. Sheer brilliance. Thanks for the laugh.

 

[PatsFanInVa]

Okay, these should actually be songs 2 and 3, with the Specter song being #4...

TRIAL IN THE PRESS

[COLTS FAN and STEELERS FAN in a bar, watching ESPN; Other voices come from TV screen]

COLTS FAN
Who is this mumbling man
Cluttering up my Sony?
Who is this unfortunate?

STEELERS FAN
Someonecheck, Coach of the Pats

COLTS FAN
Oh so that's Bill Belichick?
I'd have thought a pencil neck
He looks okay
But what does he say?
We all know about the rings
But I can't hear a ******* thing
Someonecheck, Coach of the Pats

DUNGY (from TV)
How can someone be so wrong
But so focused for so long?
A crying shame.
Bad for the game.

SCHLERETH
Now we know of this intrigue,
Is he still King, king of the league?

BELICHICK
It is what it is.

EASTERBROOK
What does he mean by that?
That is not an anwer

STEELER FAN
He's deep in trouble friend
Someonecheck, coach of the Pats

COLTS FAN
Hey dude I just realized
We kept losing to these guys...
An amazing thing!
Retro-active rings!

STEELER FAN
Stuffed the Edge and then the Bus,
Too bad it's not up to us...
It's League football...
It's Roger's call...


ROGER'S SONG
(Sung to the tune of "Herod's Song")

ROGER
Belichick I'm overjoyed to meet you face to face
You have earned yourself a name, but now I've got these tapes
Nothing lasts forever -- your dynasty is next
And I've been waiting for this day since I worked for the Jets

So if you're Belichick, you're the great Belichick,
Prove to me you're not all wet
Take away my biggest threat
Or else I've got a fix
I'll just confiscate picks
Come on, Coach of the Pats

Belichick you won't believe how far you've got to fall
The league won't need an asterisk, the press will do it all
So now you've got a girlfriend who looks like Cheryl Tiegs
You **** her and I'll **** your team; I'm cleaning up the league

So if you're Belichick, you're the great Belichick
Take away my Spygate woody
Or is there nothing in that hoody?
Draw up that play,
Make the tapes go away,
Come on, Coach of the Pats

Hey aren't you scared Belichick?
Not a quivering wreck?
Not intending to resign,
even with a hefty fine?
Take him away,
He has nothing to say,
Get out, Coach of the Pats

(Get out of my life!)

 

[PatsFanInVa]

SUPERSTAR

A PATS FAN
Every time I look at you I don't understand
How you let this Spygate thing get so out of hand
You'd have managed better if you'd shot from the stands
How'd you let such a sorry team screw up such a great brand?

If it had been Halas no-one would talk about redemption
The NFL in 43 had no anti-trust exemption

Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
All I wanna know
All I wanna know
All I wanna know
All I wanna know

Belichick
Belichick
Why could you not tape from the upper deck?
Belichick
Superstar
Why did Tom Brady buy the O-line cars?

Tell me what you think about your championships,
Why you think besides yourself's the top of the list?
Chuck Knoll and the Steelers juiced through four super bowls
The 49ers did it with Carmen on Parole
Ask how Walsh achieved it, he'll say "good Policy,"
The Cowboys taped and did cocaine, but that's not on TV

Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong
All I wanna know
All I wanna know
All I wanna know
All I wanna know

Belichick
Belichick
18-0, why was I a nervous wreck?
Belichick
Superstar
Do you think you're what they say you are?

 

[BradfordPatsFan]

Thoroughly enjoyed. Thank you!