Anyone here lose a parent/sibiling at a young age?

Sorry to hear that bro. Lost my 18 year old brother to cancer when I was 15, I've never gotten over it, but I have incorporated what I loved most about him into my memories, and try to carry it over into what I do every day. If I were wealthy I'd start some kind of scholarship in his name. Maybe in the future.

So sorry for your loss. My mum passed when I was 25 (and she 64). I was 8 months pregnant. What saddens me more than anything was I had not gotten to that age where I truly appreciated her, and the twists and turns her life took. She was from England and left her family behind to come to the US. How I wish I could talk with her about her life. I am also saddened that she never met her grand-daughter. She would have loved my daughter.

Sending hugs and prayers your way. <3

Just saw this thread B-to-M. So sorry for your loss of your Dad. I just lost my Mom about 6 weeks ago, but I am twice your age and her passing was not such as surprise as she was very ill. I can't imagine losing a parent so young as you and others have, although today is the 3 year anniversary of the death of my sister-in-law from breast cancer. She left behind my brother and their two young daughters who were just 12 and 13 at the time. They are great kids, but the sadness still hits, sometimes when you least expect it.

So nice that you are there for your Mom. Peace and healing to you.

Sorry buddy, just time can make it better

Thanks everyone...i have been in a funk since it all happened..i so wish i could go back in time and change things but it is what it is....

Things just arn't joyful anymore...i know it will come back in time but man...still so tough 4 months out.

Hug those you love..don't hold grudges or get mad..becasue 1 day that person is gone....until it happens to you as some here know..it's hard to imagine what it can feel like...it hits you like a truck...

I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you are able to be there and remain strong for your family.

Only time can help heal this.

Gunnails said:

I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you are able to be there and remain strong for your family.

Only time can help heal this.

Click to expand...

Thank you...appreciate the kind words

Brady_to_Moss said:

Thanks everyone...i have been in a funk since it all happened..i so wish i could go back in time and change things but it is what it is....

Things just arn't joyful anymore...i know it will come back in time but man...still so tough 4 months out.

Click to expand...

So sorry you are still feeling bad. Not surprised, but sorry. It takes a long time. Forever, kind of...but it does get easier.

My only wish for you right now is that you would stop wishing to go back and change things....you cannot. No one can. We can only learn and apply the lessons as we go forward. I'm pretty confident your brother would not want you to be feeling any sort of guilt. He was your brother, he loved you, we do not wish guilt on those we love.

I will keep you in my thoughts and hope that your memories soon bring you smiles instead of tears.

It will come in time.

I don't know much, but this I know.

Hope your doing better these days although I know it is still fresh at times.

Lost my mother when I was 33 and there isn't a day that goes bye that I don't think of her. The first year is especially tough because of the emptiness left behind. Sometimes you forget they are gone and you almost reach for the phone to tell them something special that is happening in your life.

Believe me, it gets easier as you get on with your life but there will always be something missing. Just cherish the happy memories and take care of your mom is the best advice I can give.

Sometimes I feel fortunate when I realize there are people that lost their parents at way younger ages than myself. One of the kids on my street lost his dad at 13. I at least had mine for 20 more years which seems like a lifetime.

Take care.

Just saw this again tonight. Prayers and thoughts to you several months later.

Just keep pushing forward. I know it's easier said than done, but I'm sure that's what your dad would've wanted.

Oh, and there's nothing wrong with giving a counseling session or two a try, should you wish to pursue that just to see if it helps or not. I haven't gone yet myself, but different people respond to different things. It may be worth a try.

Here's hoping that the season provides even the slightest distraction to you right now. I know that I could use it as well.

supafly said:

Just saw this again tonight. Prayers and thoughts to you several months later.

Just keep pushing forward. I know it's easier said than done, but I'm sure that's what your dad would've wanted.

Oh, and there's nothing wrong with giving a counseling session or two a try, should you wish to pursue that just to see if it helps or not. I haven't gone yet myself, but different people respond to different things. It may be worth a try.

Here's hoping that the season provides even the slightest distraction to you right now. I know that I could use it as well.

Click to expand...

Thank you for the kind words. Season is helping...and sometimes hurting a bit because I would watch games with him and I miss talking to him about them...so good and bad days...but we will push through

Just saw this and my belated condolences BTM. Reminded me of losing my 26 yo brother when I was 21 in college. Getting the phone call at 1 am that he was in a head on (he wasn't driving), having to go pick up mom and drive to the Cape to identify his body. He looked peacefully asleep. It was mind numbing. Remember driving in the hearse on the way to a veterans cemetery in the Cape and looking out the window at little kids playing and realizing the world just keeps on going as if nothing ever happened. Three months later I lost my other older brother.

I know you are not over this because it takes years but you seem to be strong and have a good grasp of what's important. Take care my friend it gets better and it's healthy to have the memories you are having.

venecol said:

Just saw this and my belated condolences BTM. Reminded me of losing my 26 yo brother when I was 21 in college. Getting the phone call at 1 am that he was in a head on (he wasn't driving), having to go pick up mom and drive to the Cape to identify his body. He looked peacefully asleep. It was mind numbing. Remember driving in the hearse on the way to a veterans cemetery in the Cape and looking out the window at little kids playing and realizing the world just keeps on going as if nothing ever happened. Three months later I lost my other older brother.

I know you are not over this because it takes years but you seem to be strong and have a good grasp of what's important. Take care my friend it gets better and it's healthy to have the memories you are having.

Click to expand...

Thank you for the very kind words..sorry for your losses as well my friend

So..now that the holidays are coming up...i really really don't want to go through all this..thanksgiving...Christmas...without my dad..this will be the first time without him..and it makes me sad and i just don't want to be around people...i just want to sit home..and watch football...am i normal in wanting this? ugh..

Brady_to_Moss said:

So..now that the holidays are coming up...i really really don't want to go through all this..thanksgiving...Christmas...without my dad..this will be the first time without him..and it makes me sad and i just don't want to be around people...i just want to sit home..and watch football...am i normal in wanting this? ugh..

Click to expand...

Very normal,

I was going to post tonight in this thread. The firsts of everything is going to be hard, but be there for your family (mom, siblings, kids, nephews, nieces, etc) they will help you get through this, Do it for dad, and try to keep your mind occupied.
not sure if you are a believer, but God bless, you are in my prayers

Brady_to_Moss said:

So..now that the holidays are coming up...i really really don't want to go through all this..thanksgiving...Christmas...without my dad..this will be the first time without him..and it makes me sad and i just don't want to be around people...i just want to sit home..and watch football...am i normal in wanting this? ugh..

Click to expand...

I'm 89, was married 66 years, this will be my third Christmas without my wife, she always told me there was something wrong with my brain, I wish I could hear her say that again. I am lucky though we have a large family.
I lost my mother when I was 15, that was a tough one, dirty filthy cancer.
It's normal Brady, many, many times I just want to sit alone, don't be afraid to talk to him, out loud, I do it all the time..........
Merry Christmas....

Three weeks after my wife passed away a Red Cardinal landed on the railing of my deck, I had never seen one before in this area, I am surrounded by forest, I have never seen one since, I keep looking.
I usually don't believe in those things, but?

Google "Red Cardinal"

Harry Boy said:

Three weeks after my wife passed away a Red Cardinal landed on the railing of my deck, I had never seen one before in this area, I am surrounded by forest, I have never seen one since, I keep looking.
I usually don't believe in those things, but?

Google "Red Cardinal"

Click to expand...

My younger brother passed away from brain cancer at age 50. He left two kids under 12 behind.

About 8 hours after he died I took his dog for a walk. He had a long driveway that went through open field for about 1/2 a mile. At the start of the walk a deer approached us from the north side of the drive. The buck stopped about 30 feet from us and stared. We continued on by and all the way to the mail box on the edge of the road. When I turned around to go back I saw that the buck was still there and still looking in our direction. He watched us all the way back to within 20 or so feet of him and took off. I have never seen a deer fixate on me for that long a time before. I don't believe in those things either, but I won't forget that experience.

i fear this more than any other day in my life. always good to be reminded of how special every day is, but it's so hard to realize that i'll eventually have to let go

tom444 said:

My younger brother passed away from brain cancer at age 50. He left two kids under 12 behind.

About 8 hours after he died I took his dog for a walk. He had a long driveway that went through open field for about 1/2 a mile. At the start of the walk a deer approached us from the north side of the drive. The buck stopped about 30 feet from us and stared. We continued on by and all the way to the mail box on the edge of the road. When I turned around to go back I saw that the buck was still there and still looking in our direction. He watched us all the way back to within 20 or so feet of him and took off. I have never seen a deer fixate on me for that long a time before. I don't believe in those things either, but I won't forget that experience.

Click to expand...

I have had different experiences in the past year since my fathers death. Things i can't explain in the house...signs at random times. And i never believe/believed that stuff ever.