Exclusive: NFL leaks 13-point court strategy to bring down Brady

Per Adam Shefter: In leu of other evidence against him, the NFL submitted a signed affidavit to the court yesterday, containing a list of flaws in Tom Brady's character observed over many years.

1) Writes his name all over everything in the stadium, from footballs to shoes and clothing

2) Wears shirts with his name at least three times a week

3) Constantly pointing at people and throwing things

4) Yelling at his teammates

5) Patronizes his team with winter shoes from his non-NFL sponsor

6) His high fives always leave someone hanging

7) He asked for part-time employee to show obscure parts of the rulebook to part-time referees

8) Demanded that teams be allowed to bring their own footballs

9) Cares more about titles and awards like Super Bowl MVP over something tangible of substance, giving up a brand-new vehicle prize from NFL sponsor

10) At a time the league needs circumstantial evidence to get out of the most negative year in the media, the most liked person in the NFL hides behind the NFLPA lawyers

11) Rarely showed up to work in the last five months. The commissioner, independent arbitrator, and independent investigator each earned a million per month the hard way

12) Refuses to share his personal property with fellow NFL millionaires after becoming rich thanks to the NFL

13) Even the independent arbitrator is suing him

Bumping. Have a great Friday night!

I know I'm a bit tipsy atm, but is that fourth banner actually real? I mean aside from the red ink of course.

If so that's got to be the most desperate measure I've ever seen to give validation to a team. I mean like, every year 12+ teams are defeated by the eventual world champions... perhaps I'm misunderstanding the banner. Very possible in my drunken state.

GrogansArmy said:

I know I'm a bit tipsy atm, but is that fourth banner actually real? I mean aside from the red ink of course.

If so that's got to be the most desperate measure I've ever seen to give validation to a team. I mean like, every year 12+ teams are defeated by the eventual world champions... perhaps I'm misunderstanding the banner. Very possible in my drunken state.

Click to expand...

A Colts player tweeted "on the positive side, at least we lost to the eventual champions twice in three years" and I spent almost the entire day after the Super Bowl making it and many hours since cleaning it up.

Don't worry, I posted the image here months ago and dozens of Pats Fans had the same question, only because this is exactly what the Colts would do.

I gotta say that is a damn good photoshop and very believable... minus the red ink. I actually thought to myself, yeah I could see the Colts or Jets putting up banners like that lol.

GrogansArmy said:

I gotta say that is a damn good photoshop and very believable... minus the red ink. I actually thought to myself, yeah I could see the Colts or Jets putting up banners like that lol.

Click to expand...

Thanks! The amateur MS Paint-style red ink was so ridiculously fake as to make the banner underneath look unquestionably real. Also, the story title I created was "Colts new banner defaced over the weekend by unknown perpetrators" (or similar) to put the focus on the ink. Finally, I also added the score to the real banner so that I had an avenue to put 33 - 100 on the fake one, and knew the fonts would match since I'm the one who put final scores on both banners.

PatSunday said:

Thanks! The amateur MS Paint-style red ink was so ridiculously fake as to make the banner underneath look unquestionably real. Also, the story title I created was "Colts new banner defaced over the weekend by unknown perpetrators" (or similar) to put the focus on the ink. Finally, I also added the score to the real banner so that I had an avenue to put 33 - 100 on the fake one, and knew the fonts would match since I'm the one who put final scores on both banners.

Click to expand...

This is real. By the way, when I searched for it, your handiwork was in the middle of row two on google images. Good job!