Ok that was my "blue color guy" and there is no way I believe that it took you "three beats" to figure out that it was simply a misspelling. I would believe, however, that you saw that misspelling and instantly thought, "I'm throwing up a pic of the Blue Man Group on this one." "This guy is gonna pay and pay hahd fah this one, yes sah". Right?
Tony, first of all let me say even if my first thought
were "I'm going to be a wise-ass about this," I like what you've said here, even though I disagree. So even if that
were my intent, I would take this opportunity to say no hard feelings, but I swear I was not gleefully rubbing my hands together and thinking "gotcha."
Here's the process.... and bear in mind I like to think I'm pretty bright...
1) my eyes read "...blue color guys..."
2) my brain tried to figure it out. I knew you meant something else... but a picture of the Blue Man Group got in the way as I worked on re-reading...
3) (As I said, this is a matter of skipped beats, not re-reading a dozen times...) I figured out from context what you were saying.
4) "Okay that was funny, I'm getting me a Blue Man Group picture on the google machine"
Remember before when I mentioned speechwriting? Owslek might have some of the following experience from songwriting, and obviously I'm applying it to "written English" here:
We all think the other guy knows what we
mean. The clearest writers in the world, even when they're trying very hard not to be misunderstood, are misunderstood all the time. Very good writers, way better than me (for example) write with no post-modern intent to "let the reader construct half the meaning." Yet people fill in the blanks anyway.
So in speech-writing, if you analyze an award-winning speech (yes, you can submit a speech for an award... even a speech accepting an award) usually it is written at an
even lower "grade level" than a newspaper. I'm talking seventh to tenth grade level for an audience of people with doctorates.
They can't pause and re-read the sentence. They can't put down the speech they're tired of and come back to it. They can't look up a word and come back. They're captives. The same with people listening to a song. So you make the sentences shorter. You repeat things on purpose. You don't say "domicile" if you can say "house."
In written English it's easier - readers can do all the things audiences can't. But then again, how often do you really come back to a post once you've said "Eh this makes me tired"?
It's still the writer's job to be clear (and again, we are all sinners - I'm not always clear either. When I'm on a rant, it's worse).
All that to say, it's just "three beats" we're talking about, but yes, it really did happen. I didn't try to make it happen. I think we're forever reading sentences, going "huh?", and coming back to figure them out. Then we get tired and move on. (This wasn't the case with your post - I stuck around, figured out the meaning, etc. - but you were definitely in danger of it).
That said, the clearest writers do the opposite of some of the things I personally am guilty of. They keep each sentence about one thought. They keep each paragraph about one topic. They write without a lot of clauses. You can see by the number of times I use parentheses and dashes that when I'm having fun, I disregard that stuff. This place would be no fun if it were "business writing 101" style.
But yeah my brain really did flash on Blue Man Group, and it really was confused for a moment. The unintentional meaning became a light distraction while your gentle reader tried to figure out your real meaning.
Here's a parallel: You and the guys are out drinking beer. I know you're going to say you'd be drinking out of cans on the stoop but meet me halfway... you're in a bar.
It's your great misfortune to be drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon that night. Even worse, you say to the waitress "I'll have another PBJ." There's a confused silence, and then your friends laugh at you. Nothing mean, they just crack up. She says "I thought for a minute you were ordering a sandwich." She laughs too. Nothing mean, it's just funny. She leaves. One of your friends says "I thought you were asking her for a BJ." (And he's being honest.) Everybody laughs some more. Nobody's out to get you, but
most likely next time you're out, you try to remember to say PBR. (Maybe it becomes a running joke, maybe you get nicknamed PBJ, whatever, but I think in most cases you just modify your language to fit the norm).
It happens all the time to
somebody, but in spoken language we try very hard to conform to the norms so it doesn't happen to
us. In written English, there are two camps: those who have been embarrassed by such things in the context of writing, try not to repeat the mistake, and try to pass on what they've learned to others (admittedly, sometimes by embarrassing
them); and those who insist that you can call a beer a PBJ and lecture you on what a bully you are if you point out that they meant PBR.
President Taft said "Don't write to be understood. Write so that you can't be misunderstood."
And personally, I'm
positive that I don't live up to Taft's advice. But I think I get closer when I try.
/lecture
And it gets way worse than losing a second or two on "blue color guys," believe me! Fine post, funny moment, but really, I wasn't just
waiting to do that.
Where I work you can't take a leak without splashing the shoes of a PhD, and they all think they are excellent writers. To make matters worse, I have to edit for both print and Web (think blogs), and I write speeches as well. Spoken language is not written language -- that's speechwriting 101.
