The 2014 Edition : Jets continue to suck (what else is new)

Deus Irae said:

Wanna try Peyton?

Someone had morphed the dog's mouth and whiskers onto Peyton's face, but I can't track down the picture.

No pressure, of course. Just an idea for you, if you had interest.

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I'll keep it in mind next time the creative urge hits. That is an eerie resemblance...

Wax Frog said:

I'll keep it in mind next time the creative urge hits. That is an eerie resemblance...

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Yeah, the morph was a riot. If I find it, I'll post it so you can see.

Joker said:

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Hilarious! That's what I imagine our resident Jets troll looks like.

This shall forever remain my favorite rendering of Manning Face:
http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/collie/

Joker said:

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I've seen that one around, but the one I'm thinking of was different.

Geno is going to start against MIA on MNF.

1. Geno benched for Vick because Geno is bad.
2. Vick benched for Geno because Vick is bad.

It's come full circle.

FrodoBagginz said:

1. Geno benched for Vick because Geno is bad.
2. Vick benched for Geno because Vick is bad.

It's come full circle.

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Yes, it's the Jets-cycle: one night follows the next without even the prospect of daylight.

EDIT: But that performance by Vick was one of the worst I can remember seeing by an NFL quarterback. It was Andrew Walter bad. In fact, it was like JaMarcus Russell -- minus the big arm.

Deus Irae said:

The Jets have sucked as much in the past 16 years as they sucked prior to that. They have sucked since the moment of their creation.

In fact, it's quite possible that they sucked before they even came into being. Einstein was reportedly working on this question up until his death.

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"Norman" (sic) Einstein was without a doubt the most insightful football mind of his generation, but even the brilliant Einstein could not solve it all himself.

Hawking followed up on Einstein's theories related to suckage, especially extreme suckage that results in a singularity of suckage like the New York JEST.

This led him to ask, what if you reversed the arrow of time...which led him to the answer, "Bang."

Somewhere, the black hole of suckage we see (or more properly, can't see) today, might be playing backwards, populating a whole universe with an explosion of JEST ineptitude.

I'm glad I live here

Anecdote of a Jest fan that lives near me:

As most of you know, I live in Connecticut, and at the top of a high mountain no less. We typically get 2-3" more snow than the rest of CT. Well, shortly after I first met this guy, he told me he is a Jest fan, and I told him I'm a Pats fan. Since then, he hasn't ever talked to me, which is fine. He's an odd duck.

Anyway, this guy owns a rear-wheel truck, which is problem number one in a mountainous, snowy climate. The other thing is that the guy can't be bothered to get snow tires either, AND he doesn't load down his truck either. So, this genius has an uphill drive out of his driveway. And yesterday, during the storm, he wanted to go out for some reason and you know because you hear the tires squealing.

Well, my daughters love this time of year because they can go to the window and watch the moron squealing up his driveway, tearing his lawn apart when he slides off the driveway, making all kinds of smoke, and sliding all over the road as he heads out.

Jest fan...

A brief addendum or two.

jmt57 said:

-- In the history of the NFL, there are only six non-defunct franchises that have a worse all-time winning percentage than the Jets.

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Yeah? Yeah? Welll you're obviously not counting the 1920 Muncie Flyers of the American Professional Football Association, who lost their one game 45-0 then went out of existence. (At least their suffering was short-lived.) I am sure that counting the APFA and the AAFC...

Never mind

-- The Jets have fewer all-time victories than any other original AFL franchise.

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-- Of all the franchises that were in operation at the same time the Jets began playing, only one (the Cardinals) has made the playoffs fewer times in their existence.

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I'd say double check for APFA Cardinals or AAFC Cardinals or something, since there have been Cardinals for so long... but I'm not sure there even were playoffs for any of those teams.

On the other hand, right now the Cardinals faithful have something to root for. So "Sucks to be them" isn't even accurate. As always, it just sucks to be the JEST.

-- If the Jets went 13-3 while the Patriots went 3-13 every year from now until 2021, the Patriots would still have a better all-time record than the Jets.

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Put another way, if you took all the female JEST fans in America and laid them end-to-end, well frankly, you'd just have to change your name to Cromartie.

-- The winningest Jets head coach of all time is Weeb Ewbank. His record with the Jets is 71-77-6. That's right: the best coach in the Jets history lost more games than he won. During his eleven seasons as HC of NYJ he made the playoffs twice, with just three winning seasons.

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Additionally, his name sounds like he's a game show host. Actually, he kind of was.

-- By comparison Bill Belichick had more wins from 2008 through last season. Note that span does not include the 16-win 2007 season, but it does include a year with a QB that hadn't started since high school.

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Maybe what the JESTERS should really be doing is watching the waiver wire for Pats cuts or trading away some of their picks for Pats players... the "good times" in New York were when they picked up Curtis Martin. Imagine the improvement on that team if they had Cassel instead of GeNO or Vick. 59% completion percentage, lifetime! Slightly more TD than INT!!!

Never mind, I forgot: like the Pats in reverse, what the JEST do is take proven talent and turn it into "possible upside." Thinking more of Martin than Cassel on that one.

But I am supposed to believe that suddenly, magically next year everything will change - based on nothing to do with football, but rather on a 'what comes up must come down' rationalization?

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No, you're not supposed to believe it... he's trying to get himself to believe it.

You know when we have our "binkies" during the draft, and we think how cool it would be if player X translated to the NFL, and made that last 5% difference that is the catalyst for things to snap into perfect alignment? For the JEST, that one draft binky is supposed to make the 95% difference.

No wonder they break quarterbacks. "No pressure dude."

I still feel for ya, Jetsfan ol buddy ol pal. Gotta call 'em like ya see 'em.

Here's a lovely little tidbit to make us all happy that we're not Jets fans on this Thanksgiving day:

In Washington, coach Jay Gruden apparently has the power to pick his quarterback. In New York, coach Rex Ryan apparently doesn’t.

Per Manish Mehta of the New York Daily News, Ryan, offensive coordinator Marty Mornhinweg, and the “majority” of others in the organization wanted to stick with Mike Vick. Instead, Geno Smith will return to the starting lineup.

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http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2014/11/27/coaching-staff-wanted-vick-gets-geno-instead/

That's right.... according to the reporter, John Idzik, Jr. is the one making the call on who starts at QB for the New York Jets.

Deus Irae said:

Here's a lovely little tidbit to make us all happy that we're not Jets fans on this Thanksgiving day:

http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2014/11/27/coaching-staff-wanted-vick-gets-geno-instead/

That's right.... according to the reporter, John Idzik, Jr. is the one making the call on who starts at QB for the New York Jets.

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Truly frightening. I mean, not compared to Rex Ryan making any calls related to football. Crap. I dunno about that either. It's a complex world of suckage over there... the singularity of suckage where all the laws of football break down...

So Rex can't buy the groceries, he can't cook the dinner... I guess he's in change of the goddam snacks.

It's interesting to see how some of the other regular posters characterize how they view this thread. The way I view it, metaphorically, is as a giant cesspool of Jest suckage, where a lot of guys , and more than a few spunky lasses, come to void their thoughts (and other bodily and mental processes...I'm not pointing fingers, Joker, I'm just saying) about the moth-eaten, flea ridden, toe suckin' franchise of the Green Slime. Yes, everyone comes in, goes up to the edge and lets fly ... After which you feel so much better, having lightened your load of vituperative venom or phlegm-like humor, on the green-bean bloated carcass. So imagine my surprise after being away for a bit, I come in and see Jetsfan3.14159 run up to the edge and JUMP IN. And not only jump in but delight in wallowing around in the muck and mire .... Even though he has been told to get out the honeypot and find another thread....but nooooo, he wants to wallow more, wants people to jump in and join him....so of course everyone starts letting fly again....all I could think of was the Monty Python movie ("come back and I'll butt you to death"). The amount of green sewerage that has flown up his nose-holes and flooded his ears has clearly corroded the bumpous of a brainstem which controls his physiology. Tunescribe would be administering a mercy killing if he wanted to be so bothered. How bad is this Jetsfan90210? Well, let me put it this way...when was the last time you were pulling for one of Deus' cut and Pasters... LOL.

And when PWP tries to explain it to him s-l-o-w-l-y, how did Jetfan666 react? Like a monkey in a cage throwing crap, or to keep to the analogy, a Sea-monkey in a puddle of poo flapping its tail. Always a good idea to insult one of the boards most respected posters when your own existence here is lower than the toe-jam in the last guy to respond to an ad placed by Wrecks on Alt.com.

I for one am not going to use the ignore function on Jetsfan2468. It will be far more fascinating to see him endlessly beating on against the current of Green sludge.....

Seacoast Fan said:

It's interesting to see how some of the other regular posters characterize how they view this thread. The way I view it, metaphorically, is as a giant cesspool of Jest suckage, where a lot of guys , and more than a few spunky lasses, come to void their thoughts (and other bodily and mental processes...I'm not pointing fingers, Joker, I'm just saying) about the moth-eaten, flea ridden, toe suckin' franchise of the Green Slime. Yes, everyone comes in, goes up to the edge and lets fly ... After which you feel so much better, having lightened your load of vituperative venom or phlegm-like humor, on the green-bean bloated carcass. So imagine my surprise after being away for a bit, I come in and see Jetsfan3.14159 run up to the edge and JUMP IN. And not only jump in but delight in wallowing around in the muck and mire .... Even though he has been told to get out the honeypot and find another thread....but nooooo, he wants to wallow more, wants people to jump in and join him....so of course everyone starts letting fly again....all I could think of was the Monty Python movie ("come back and I'll butt you to death"). The amount of green sewerage that has flown up his nose-holes and flooded his ears has clearly corroded the bumpous of a brainstem which controls his physiology. Tunescribe would be administering a mercy killing if he wanted to be so bothered. How bad is this Jetsfan90210? Well, let me put it this way...when was the last time you were pulling for one of Deus' cut and Pasters... LOL.
And when PWP tries to explain it to him s-l-o-w-l-y, how did Jetfan666 react? Like a monkey in a cage throwing crap, or to keep to the analogy, a Sea-monkey in a puddle of poo flapping its tail. Always a good idea to insult one of the boards most respected posters when your own existence here is lower than the toe-jam in the last guy to respond to an ad placed by Wrecks on Alt.com.
I for one am not going to use the ignore function on Jetsfan2468. It will be far more fascinating to see him endlessly beating on against the current of Green sludge.....

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I'm not going to entertain this piece of crap. Ignore feature used once again.

Also, for your information, I've already ran circles around Tunescribe in numerous debates. His arguments are weak, and lack substance. I'll entertain him, once he improves his debating skills and football knowledge in general. I will say this, he is a far better poster than Desus0.5 is, but compared to others here he's awful. There are several good posters, and other threads here , that I enjoy , so the "Go find another thread" arguement is pretty outdated, pal.

I hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving, dolt!

Jetsfan25678 said:

Also, for your information, I've already ran circles around Tunescribe in numerous debates.

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"Il'll entertain him, once he improves his debating skills and football knowledge in general"

you ARE entertaining him...intergalactic stupidity is eminently readable and perversely delicious...like rubber necking a car crash on the interstate.

Jetsfan25678 said:

I'm not going to entertain this piece of crap. Ignore feature used once again.

Also, for your information, I've already ran circles around Tunescribe in numerous debates. His arguments are weak, and lack substance. I'll entertain him, once he improves his debating skills and football knowledge in general. I will say this, he is a far better poster than Desus0.5 is, but compared to others here he's awful. There are several good posters, and other threads here , that I enjoy , so the "Go find another thread" arguement is pretty outdated, pal.

I hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving, dolt!

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Still here?

You'd send a glass eye to sleep.



Your little quest to derail this thread is pointless and will be for nothing.

People think the Raiders are the biggest laughing stock of the NFL - not a chance. Many would love to see them actually do well. But your bunch of toe-sucking, dog-murdering, concussion-prone ****bags bring most sane/normal people to the point of vomiting. If they disbanded the Jets tomorrow most fans would not give a damn.

You're irrelevant. A footnote. Forever amen.

Ian, can we get rid of this one now? He offers nothing to the board.

BritPat said:

Still here?

You'd send a glass eye to sleep.

Your little quest to derail this thread is pointless and will be for nothing.

People think the Raiders are the biggest laughing stock of the NFL - not a chance. Many would love to see them actually do well. But your bunch of toe-sucking, dog-murdering, concussion-prone ****bags bring most sane/normal people to the point of vomiting. If they disbanded the Jets tomorrow most fans would not give a damn.

You're irrelevant. A footnote. Forever amen.

Ian, can we get rid of this one now? He offers nothing to the board.

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Derail this thread? Have you seen the other posts here? How am I supposed to derail a thread, that several posters have called a "joke"I haven't comitted one bannable offense.
I've had several good discussions with others in various threads.

if you don't like my posts put me on ignore. It's as simple as that.

My grandmother was English, Brit Pat...I'm thinking we gotta be related. Every post you make seems like it's torn from MY subconscious. You see the Jets exactly as I do, like a brother thousands of miles removed.