Q:Hey, Tom, I have to ask you about Matt Cassel, your sidekick.
TB: Yes.
Q:Because what went on this week between the two of you guys? What happened?
TB:Yes. Matt and I fight like teenage girls.
Q:You do?
TB:Yes, we do.
Q:What happened?
TB:We are always slapping each other around and wrestling and slap boxing and [messing] around with each other in the weight room. And so I decided to take that to the next level. And we were messing around in the quarterback room one day and he walked in with a milkshake, and I kind of put my foot by the door, and I kicked the door and the milkshake splashed up and went all over him. So he sat down, and I was laughing. So I said give me the towel, because I wanted to clean up the wall. So I threw the towel at his face, and it had shake all over it. He had a little shake in his mouth and he spit it all over me.
Q:So Cassel spit on you?
TB:Yes. So we had all this shake all over us. I smelled terrible. So I just laughed. I said I don't get mad, I get even. So the next day, I had one of my friends remove all the tires from his car and leave them right at his locker as he walked in off the practice field. So it was pretty good. He had to walk home that day.
Q:So let me get this straight. You had his car up on cinderblocks?
TB:Yes. It was up on cinderblocks, sitting right out in the parking lot. It was pretty funny.
Q:What did you do with the tires?
TB:I had three of them, and I made him search for the fourth one. I didn't tell him where the fourth one was. But all three of them were stacked up. So he was getting undressed after practice undoing the tape on his ankles, sitting on his tires. It was pretty funny.
Q:Did Cassel do anything to your car?
TB:No. I think I scared him. I don't know if you guys have ever seen the movie "Braveheart," but at the end when Mel Gibson is lying there and the king is laying on his death bed and the guy who is torturing him says, you just claim your allegiance to Long Shanks, so I made him call me Long Shanks. And after that we called a truce. So he knows that now I am willing to go to any, any depths to make him pay. So I think Matt Light was involved and I'm still looking for a confirmation on that. He filled my car, the entire car with Styrofoam peanuts, which he did the following day. And it was a rainy day, he opened the sunroof, and filled the entire car with it.
Q:Who did?
TB:Matt Light, and he blamed it on Cassel. But I know Cassel is way too scared to do anything. Matt Light is still claiming that he didn't do anything, but I've got confirmation from several different sources. So I am still waiting to get him back. But Belichick kind of called a moratorium on pranks at this point. But it's nice, keeps the team loose.
Q:What color was the milkshake flavor?
TB:Chocolate Myoplex. It was so nasty. It was all over me. Yes, you got to do something. We're around each other so much that we just try to...
Q:What day was that, Tom?
TB:Wednesday (September 27).
Q:And what day was the tires?
TB:Wednesday. No. Thursday (September 28), Thursday. And Friday (September 29) was my car, so yes. And finally it was called off. So it was pretty funny.
Q:Who cleaned your car off?
TB:I didn't. I've got a few friends around here, so 20 bucks goes a long way to a bunch of different guys.
Q:Did Stacey (James) help?
TB:No. The little guys should learn not to mess with guys with more money than them.
