Cryptic Bill Belichick Insists He's Never Heard Of A Man Named Tom Brady.

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Link here.

GLENDALE, AZ—Patriots head coach Bill Belichick responded to reporters' questions regarding Tom Brady's injury status by repeatedly denying any association with a Patriots quarterback, or any other person, by that name. "I repeat: I have no knowledge of or acquaintance with anybody named Tom Brady, and I resent any implication that I might have any knowledge of this Brady individual's personal life," an alternately smirking and confrontational Belichick told reporters during his unusually contentious Media Week press conference. "Why? Does this guy say he knows me? Is that it? Because if this Bradley [sic] fellow is blaming me for getting hurt, that's all I need." Belichick then went on to insist that he was not an NFL football coach but a real-estate salesman from Tempe, and attempted to sell golf-course time-share condos to all in attendance.

 

[MRBLAZE]

That site is satirical.

 

[Fogbuster]

That site is satirical.

Are you sure???






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[MRBLAZE]

Are you sure???

This is the same board that takes comments out of context and turns them into message board fodder for the masses to chew on. So I thought I would remove all doubt.

 

[Patjew]

The Onion is the best. That's one of my favorite stories I've read there recently.

 

[Fogbuster]

This is the same board that takes comments out of context and turns them into message board fodder for the masses to chew on. So I thought I would remove all doubt.

Thanks!!! You had me worried there for a minute!


(Not really. )


[size=+3]Go Pats!![/size]



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[AStack75]

Usually I find the Onion to be hilarious. That one was was pretty lame IMHO.

 

[BeantownRox]

What?? The Onion is not a reputable fact machine? When did this happen??

 

[Watson's IQ]

Usually I find the Onion to be hilarious. That one was was pretty lame IMHO.

Their sports stories are consistently less funny, IMO, than the rest of their stuff. Probably because they take less time to work on it and get it right than the fake news, which isn't always time-sensitive.

 

[xmarkd400x]

What?? The Onion is not a reputable fact machine? When did this happen??

Hell froze over.

 

[IcyPatriot]

Also from today's Onion:

GLENDALE, AZ—In an apparent attempt to raise his morale and that of his team, Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress released a statement Monday saying that his own personal 6'5" height was superior to that of the New England Patriots. "I have successfully out-stood every other player in the league when it comes to tallness," Burress' statement read in part. "That is a fact. And I get taller when I raise my arms, and taller again when I jump. The Pats are good, but there is nothing they can do about me in the department of being full-grown." Patriots linebacker Junior Seau responded to Burress' statement by saying that, while Burress was a very tall player indeed and had displayed great height in the past, it remained to be seen whether he was taller than the Patriots defense when they were playing well.

 

[IcyPatriot]

Today's Onion is on a roll .. must be fun to write for that site.

January 31, 2008
http://www.theonion.com/content/sports_fan/on_the_patriots_being
On The Patriots Being Favored By 12 Points In The Super Bowl:

"I thought the line was fair. But then I heard it
was set by Bill Belichick, so now I don't know what to think."

I'd reconsider that line—the Giants
already announced they were going to lose by 17."​

 

[RayClay]

That site is satirical.

...........................................

 

[RayClay]

This is the same board that takes comments out of context and turns them into message board fodder for the masses to chew on. So I thought I would remove all doubt.

Mr. Blaze, could you make me a "that post is satirical" stamp in case i need it?

Thanks in advance.

 

[spacecrime]

The Onion hasn't been as good lately, and this one is just stupid.

 

[TheGodInAGreyHoodie]

Also from today's Onion:

GLENDALE, AZ—In an apparent attempt to raise his morale and that of his team, Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress released a statement Monday saying that his own personal 6'5" height was superior to that of the New England Patriots. "I have successfully out-stood every other player in the league when it comes to tallness," Burress' statement read in part. "That is a fact. And I get taller when I raise my arms, and taller again when I jump. The Pats are good, but there is nothing they can do about me in the department of being full-grown." Patriots linebacker Junior Seau responded to Burress' statement by saying that, while Burress was a very tall player indeed and had displayed great height in the past, it remained to be seen whether he was taller than the Patriots defense when they were playing well.

That lier.

First, he is not even the tallest Giant, he is 6-5, both Boss, Kevin & McKenzie, Kareem are 6-6.

Second, Brady, Kyle & Seymour, Richard & O'Callaghan, Ryan & Britt, Wesley are all taller than him. The tallest player on the field will be Britt at 6-8.

 

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Articles from the Onion are 100% facts-based and anyone who posts to say otherwise is guilty of libel.