LOL! Actually a likely scenario as Stephens fumbled 5 times that year. Here's my tale-of-the-tape/ game prediction:
Offense: Edge Miami as they are scoring at a 16.4ppg rate vs. the Rust Pats 11.3ppg. Miami has already scored 32 points more than Rust's Pats did in 16 games (213-181). Miami has the #27 ranked offense (of 32 teams) while Rust's Pats sported the #28 offense (of 28 teams).
QB: Edge Rust Pats. #20 (of 28) pass offense vs. Miami's #26 (of 32) pass offense. It's close and there is a notable similiarity here with the QB situation. Both teams played most of the year with a JAG QB backed up by a rookie. Both teams also had the help of a more experienced QB who wasn't able to stay on the field. I give the nod to the Rust Pats because of the experience level of Wilson over Lemon. Here are the numbers:
Marc Wilson: 54.7% comp pct, 1625 yds, 6 TD's, 11 Int, 61.6 QB rtg
Tommy Hodson: 54.7% comp pct, 968 yds, 3 TD's, 6 Int, 68.5 QB rtg
Steve Grogan: 54.7% comp pct, 615 yds, 3 TD's, 6 Int, 76.1 QB rtg
Cleo Lemon: 56.7% comp pct, 1164 yds, 3 TD's, 6 Int, 65.5 QB rtg
John Beck: 54.7% comp pct, 424 yds, 0 TD's, 3 Int, 53.6 QB rtg
Trent Green: 54.7% comp pct, 987 yds, 5 TD's, 7 Int, 72.6 QB rtg
RB: Edge Miami. But only if Ronnie Brown plays. Miami fields the #20 rushing attack (of 32 teams) vs. the Rust Pats #25 (of 28). Brown is far and away the best back on the field in this game averaging 5.1 ypc with 4 TD's and Zero Fumbles vs. John Stephens at 3.8 ypc with 2 TD's and 5 Fumbles.
WR: Edge Rust Pats. Irving Fryar is clearly the best WR in this game with 54 grabs for 856 yds, a 15.9 avg and 4 TD's although there is a sharp drop off in production for the Rust Pats after that with Hart Lee Dykes, Greg McMurtry, and Cedric Jones combining for 77 catches and just 2 TD's. Miami, however, has it even worse (particularly so with Chambers now a Charger) because they have no steady options at WR after after Marty Booker. Ted Ginn Jr's 22 catches for a 14.8 yd avg and 1 TD don't come close to filling the gap between these two squads. Even when you throw in Derek Hagan's 24 catches it's still not close.
TE: Rust Pats. The Rust Pats have a go to guy at TE in Marv Cook who posts 51 catches for 455 yds and 5 TD's while it takes Miami's David Martin
and Justin Peelle combined to even be in the neighborhood with 53 catches, 426 yds, and 4 TD's. Even then they still fall short and I didn;t even mention Zeke Mowatt and his famous patriot missiles.
OL: Edge Miami. While the rust Pats boast a young Bruce Armstrong at LT and a guy (Danny Villa) who plays C, G, or T, Miami has the better run blocking and in pass blocking it isn't even close with the Rust Pats having surrendered 58 sacks to just 27 for their Miami counterparts.
Defense: Edge Miami. It's close but the Rust Pats are 27th in total defense (of 28 teams) having allowed 446 points (a 27.9 ppg avg). While a little better against the pass (#13 of 28 teams) they are dead last against the run. Miami, OTOH, boasts the #2 ranked pass defense but they are also dead last against the rush. It averages out, however, to the #18 ranked defense for the Phins giving them the nod over the Rust Pats even though they are also surrendering more than 27 ppg (27.3).
DL: Edge Miami. The Rust Pats get blown off the ball on this one. Even with the plucky Tim Goad at the nose the Rust Pats start a rookie at one end (Ray Agnew) and a JAG (Brent Williams) at the other vs. Miami's amazing Jason Taylor, a big run stuffing pant load in the middle named Keith Traylor, and Vonnie Holliday.
LB: Edge Rust Pats. Andre Tippett is nearing the end but he still tips the balances in the Rust Pats favor. Particularly teamed with a young #59 "The Undertaker" Vincent Brown. Oh and let's not forget Ed Reynolds and Johnny Rembert either. Miami counters with it's own aging superstar, Zach Thomas and a young Channing Crowder. If I were inclined toward fairness, which I am not, I might judge the LBers even or slightly lean in Miami's favor. But being a Pats Fan, and given that soon to be hall-of-famer Andre Tippett was my favorite Patriot growing up, I give the sentimental nod to the Rust Pats.
DB: Edge Rust Pats. Miami's Donovan Darius will knock your lights out but he can't cover. The Allens (Will and Jason) are okay too but the Rust Pats just bring it at DB with Ronnie Lippett, Maurice Hurst, Fred Marion, and Rod McSwain. I like this group and prefer to blame the DLine for the pass defense problems. Even Lippett and Hurst can't cover people long enough for that sorry ass group to pressure the QB.
Special teams: Edge Miami. The Rust Pats have no threat to answer Ted Ginn Jr's 23.6 yd KR and 10.1 yd PR avg. Fryar fielded the punts to the tune of a poor 4.8 yd avg. and Sammy Martin toted the rock on kickoffs for a 20.8 yd avg. I also have to give the edge to Miami in the kicking game with Jay Feely vs. Jason Staurovsky and Brandon Fields vs. Brian Hansen and his two blocked punts.
Coaching: Even. IMO, neither of these guys could coach their way out of a wet paper bag.
The game: The Rust Pats won but one game (and that by a narrow 16-14 margin over Indy in the second game of the year). They surrendered almost 28 ppg (27.9) and only scored 11.3. Add to that the fact that Miami put up four TD's on the current Pats this year and wins the above tale-of-the-tape by a 6-5-1 count, and logic dictates Miami pulling out a closely fought victory, say 17-16 over the Rust Pats. However, being such a homer and thinking we may be just three weeks away from referring to this years Doofins as the worst team of all time, I'm going with my heart on this one.
18-17 Rust Pats win on six Staurovsky FG's set up by three INT's by Hurst, Marion, and Lippett and the deciding one set up by a Tippett forced fumble!
