The voice of Logan Mankins, as told to Shakadave

[shakadave]

I am Logan Mankins. I agreed a year ago to play this past year on the promise that I would be taken care of in 2010. You Patriots have wronged me. I was raised where a man's word is everything. I took you at your word. You promised me you'd take care of me but that was a lie. You offered me only 7 million dollars a year to play guard. I am a jerk.

Yours tool-ly,

---Logan

 

[Joker]

I am Rex Ryan. I agreed a year ago to coach the NY Jets on the promise that I would be fed a 10,000 calorie diet. You Jets have fed me salads,rice and beans. I was raised where a man's gut is everything. I took you at your word. You promised me you'd take care of me but that was a lie. You offered me only cafeteria food. I am now a hungry jerk.

Yours blubberingly drunk,

----Rex "The Inhaler" Ryan

 

[Gwedd]

I am Albert Haynesworth. I took your money.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Trade me, or I will become more petulant!

 

[patsfan-1982]

i am the voice of betty grable and i say the corn stays on the table

 

[Brady2Welker]

Im the voice of Tom Brady. screw you guys, BB, and the krafts. Imma go play with my boy mike singletary.... Or at least that's what a portion of this board predicts.

 

[Mike the Brit]

I am the Voice of Christmas Past. I think I'm lost.

 

[lillestroom]

Hi...

I'm Ty Law.

I've been on the slide since I left Foxboro and am nothing better that a situational nickelback now.

I hate the Pats. I've got to feed my family somehow. Wait on... thats the Globe on my caller ID. Ching Ching.

F*** you all.

 

[Pats726]

I am Albert Haynesworth. I took your money.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Trade me, or I will become more petulant!

(I don't think Haynesworth would understand that word...petulant...)

 

[Bostonian1962]

I am Logan Mankins. I agreed a year ago to play this past year on the promise that I would be taken care of in 2010. You Patriots have wronged me. I was raised where a man's word is everything. I took you at your word. You promised me you'd take care of me but that was a lie. You offered me only 7 million dollars a year to play guard. I am a jerk.

Yours tool-ly,

---Logan

When I a player like Mankin's lies like he has been, all the while calling the other side a liar, can he still show face again on that team? When he says, 'the team lied as they told me they'd address my contract during the uncapped year', it implies that they didn't. Now that we know he was offered $7M per year by that team, HE clearly lied. Can you trust somebody like that again to play on your team?

 

[Bostonian1962]

(I don't think Haynesworth would understand that word...petulant...)

Hell, I don't understand the word petulant, and I'm honoring my contract and showing up at work.

 

[Triumph]

I am Laurence "Koolaid" Maroney

Ya'll laugh and boo me cause I can dance. Well, youll see this year suckas. Im gettin ready to bust out and raise the roof. Albert Breer is even going to write an article about it. You may have noticed that Ive had a little problem holding on the ball because Mankins cant block, but hes on the way out.

RESPECT 2010

LKM

ps: Count Chocula is pretty good cereal.

 

[IllegalContact]

When I a player like Mankin's lies like he has been, all the while calling the other side a liar, can he still show face again on that team? When he says, 'the team lied as they told me they'd address my contract during the uncapped year', it implies that they didn't. Now that we know he was offered $7M per year by that team, HE clearly lied. Can you trust somebody like that again to play on your team?

he's been lying? and you know this how?

 

[PatsFanInVa]

I am Laurence "Koolaid" Maroney

Ya'll laugh and boo me cause I can dance. Well, youll see this year suckas. Im gettin ready to bust out and raise the roof. Albert Breer is even going to write an article about it. You may have noticed that Ive had a little problem holding on the ball because Mankins cant block, but hes on the way out.

RESPECT 2010

LKM

ps: Count Chocula is pretty good cereal.

I am the voice of Jerry rice. True, I had a GOAT career, and you're just first in a running committee on a passing team. But if you can dance, there's a tv contract in your future... You get to spin pretty ladies around and get paid for it

great job outlasting Chad though

 

[spacecrime]

When I a player like Mankin's lies like he has been, all the while calling the other side a liar, can he still show face again on that team? When he says, 'the team lied as they told me they'd address my contract during the uncapped year', it implies that they didn't. Now that we know he was offered $7M per year by that team, HE clearly lied. Can you trust somebody like that again to play on your team?

I guess he thought that word wouldn't come out that he had been offered a contract.

He sure looks like a fool now. His agent probably has ulcers after reading what Mankins said.

 

[NYCPatsFan]

(I don't think Haynesworth would understand that word...petulant...)

How about "Trade me ...Or... I'll become a peanut".

 

[N.Eman]

I am Rex Ryan. I agreed a year ago to coach the NY Jets on the promise that I would be fed a 10,000 calorie diet. You Jets have fed me salads,rice and beans. I was raised where a man's gut is everything. I took you at your word. You promised me you'd take care of me but that was a lie. You offered me only cafeteria food. I am now a hungry jerk.

Yours blubberingly drunk,

----Rex "The Inhaler" Ryan

LOL awesome!!! This should've ended

"P.S

Dirty sanchez is eating my hotdogs" **starts weeping on the podium***

 

[lillestroom]

Hi fans.

Travis Henry here.

Any fine *****es want to PM me?

 

[Ochmed Jones]

Hello, I am the voice of Asanti Samuel.

BB has drafted a fourth rounder (Wilhite), two second rounders (Wheatley and Butler) and now a first rounder (McCourty) and none can duplicate my production! Why didn't BB just pay me the money and spend those draft picks trying to find the next Willie McGinest or Mike Vrabel instead!

Penny wise and draft picks follish is BB!!!!!!

 

[MoLewisrocks]

Hello, I am the voice of Asanti Samuel.

BB has drafted a fourth rounder (Wilhite), two second rounders (Wheatley and Butler) and now a first rounder (McCourty) and none can duplicate my production! Why didn't BB just pay me the money and spend those draft picks trying to find the next Willie McGinest or Mike Vrabel instead!

Penny wise and draft picks follish is BB!!!!!!

Yo 'Sante,

You're a great ballhawk, just a lousy tackler and way too 'spensive so I hope your working on your form even as we speak. We're gonna need it since I traded away our pro bowl QB to a division rival... You be next...

The sucka who signed your sorry ass, lol

Andy Reid, the players coach

 

[shakadave]

ps: Count Chocula is pretty good cereal.

I am Count Chocula. I'm part of a nutritious breakfast*. You probably know my pals Frankenberry and Booberry, but can you name my third pal? For a brief time he was the fourth monster cereal. His name once won shakadave's brother a t-shirt on Morgan White's radio trivia show for best question of the day. Enjoy my cereal with marshmallow surprises, and scroll down for the answer....


*with toast, juice, milk, and a bag of spinach


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Answer: Fruit Brute