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  #1  
Old 12-23-2007, 05:02 PM
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Default Why Do Dip Sh!t News Anchors Say Thank You To The Weatherman

I just watched a sappy news women almost give herself a hernia "thanking" the weather man, can any of you tell me why they "thank" the weather man, what the hell did he do for them

I just had a mental flashback about guns and SUV's that I posted on another thread and it made me think of News People & Weather People.

How many times have you watched this crap:
Your local TV weatherman, lets say his name is Rodney Windoff, he has a pretty young girl sitting beside him who delivers your local news each evening, her name is Thelma Korassky.

Make sure you watch these two the next time a big storm is headed your way.

Thelma starts first, she will tell you all about the SUV that attacked a group of Nuns on a street corner killing them instantly, then she will tell you about the Right Wing Red Neck Gun Nut that came home from a hunting trip and drowned three of his children then disemboweled his wife’s mother, then she will somehow try to connect all this mayhem to GW Bush or Ronald Reagan (even though he’s dead), she then ends this segment by telling us all how handsome John “Fonda” Kerry looked in his “home movie” with his gun hunting down the enemy in the jungles of Viet Nam, she will look very sad when she is forced to mention that, Kerry Lost.

Now to the weatherman, Rod, (as Thelma calls him) there is a two day “killer blizzard” headed our way and Thelma goes from her “funeral parlor look of sadness” after telling us all about these Republican Neo Con murders and atrocities to a mood of sheer delight, she says, “now lets have a look at our local weather with Rodney Windoff” she then gushes, “hi Rod, looks like we will be needing our boots and shovels eh” “tee hee giggle giggle, fawn and swoon”, there is a snow storm coming that may kill ten or twenty people, put the power off for three days and bury the whole city and this little fool is slobbering, squealing and spluttering trying to make snow shovel jokes.

Rodney Windoff now starts twitching and babbling about how many people this storm killed out in Chicago, then the scene goes to “Rods Map”, all of a sudden, BANG, Rod jumps in front of the map with his little clicker, he scares the sh!t out of thousands of viewers, dogs run out of the living room for the safety of the kitchen.

Rod is all wound up now, he has been waiting all day for this, he is jumping up and down, flapping his arms all over New York State and Vermont, he is even drooling, (he may even have an erection) then he tells us all about the horrors we can expect in the middle of the night.

This lasts for about five minutes, Rod looks as though he has climaxed, he is breathing heavily, and then, Thelma takes over.

Thelma has a bigger grin on then Rod did, she screams, “OH THANKS ROD”, got that, she thanks him, what in the name of Christ is she thanking him for. Why do they "THANK" the weatherman, what the hell did he do for us???

Watch the news tonight, you all have these Thelma’s and Rod’s in your home town, they introduce the weatherman with “umbrella and raincoat jokes” then treat him as though he was “Jesus”, when he is done telling you that you and your family may die tonight in a blizzard, THEY THANK HIM.

Why do they thank the weatherman, does he make the sun come up??

GEE, GOSH, THANKS ROD.

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  #2  
Old 12-24-2007, 06:40 PM
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Default Re: Why Do Dip Sh!t News Anchors Say Thank You To The Weatherman

Did you ever hear of EB Rideout

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Old 12-24-2007, 06:57 PM
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Default Re: Why Do Dip Sh!t News Anchors Say Thank You To The Weatherman

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Boy View Post
I just watched a sappy news women almost give herself a hernia "thanking" the weather man, can any of you tell me why they "thank" the weather man, what the hell did he do for them

Why do they thank the weatherman, does he make the sun come up??

GEE, GOSH, THANKS ROD.


When I was younger my then girlfriends dad Tom used to make me laugh my butt off when the weatherman came on. Back then around here it was the infamous "Art Lake". Well, Art never got all excited about storms like this dud "Gary Ley" does ... Gary I swear has orgasms over weather.

Anyways, Art would do the weather .. he was not a meteorologist and it was rather mechanical ... except for storms. He would push them at us ... he would "CUP" the Nor' easters and pull them up and he would "WAVE" the storms coming our way from the Great Lakes region.

The funniest was when he would "WAVE" and "CUP" at the same time and "PANCAKE" them together like an executioner telling you your time has come.

He was thanked and Gary Ley is thanked ... for what I do not know. They are right most of the time but they never give the "Thank You's" back when they are wrong.

Last edited by IcyPatriot; 12-24-2007 at 06:59 PM.
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Old 12-25-2007, 11:37 AM
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Default Re: Why Do Dip Sh!t News Anchors Say Thank You To The Weatherman

They're good people and they mean well and most of them are very inteligent but they crack me up, my grandaughter visited us the other day and she said to my wife "whats he yelling and laughing at in there" my wife told her "he's probably watching the weather man".

I really do believe they have Orgasms when something big is coming, we have one guy up here in Maine that constantly laughs all the way through his report, if a Meteor were coming to comletely destroy New England he would be waving his clicker around and laughing his a$s off.

When killer blizzards are on the way "snowman jokes" are one of their favorites, people will be stranded in their cars, old people will choke to death waiting for an ambulance and these people are laughing and talking about building a Snowman.

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Last edited by Harry Boy; 12-25-2007 at 11:38 AM.
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