1. Child Abuse - A first offense is punishable by excruciating death. No exceptions.
2. Welfare, SS, Food Stamps, for illegal drug abusers - Required drug testing once every two weeks for all who receive public assistance. You fail, you're cut off and admitted into a rehab center which will receive your "funds" to pay for your care while you get clean.
3. Cigarettes - Anyone caught selling them is imprisoned for 6 months. No exceptions.
4. Fast Food - This country is too damn fat and lazy. Force them to sell more health conscious choices and turn away obese customers all together.
5. Laziness - Every able bodied person is required to exercise for 1 hour a day, six days a week. You fat bastards are pathetic. Do a damn push-up or something!!
6. Reality TV. ALL OF IT.
7. Wearing sunglasses at night. Come-on...
8. Banana Hammocks in public.
9. ESPN
10. Bandwagon fans