09-08-2006, 08:30 PM
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#4
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PatsFans.com Supporter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 20,550
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Re: Idea for a Sticky for this Board
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Originally Posted by patchick
I think that would mean an awful lot of asterisks!
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This shows a serious lask of creativity, even Ron Borges can channel BB without asterisks.
shmessy, where do we find the time between grousing about players and talking smack about upcoming opponents, it seems hopeless....
In the interest of encouraging satire, I present this article:
Scary storylines abound as NFL season opens
http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/5937548
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So, instead of tackling the softer issues, I'm here to investigate the NFL's potential for terrifying outcomes. While your interpretation of terror may differ from mine, we all can agree that the league is up to here with scare potential.
Anyway, in no particular order, the following list identifies the horror storylines we should follow on the road to Super Bowl XLI:
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Carolina Panthers cheerleaders are required to sign a waiver that forbids anything beyond shaking hands in a public restroom. This decision absolutely terrifies married men who follow the NFL and radio talk-show hosts.
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In a move that scares the life out of fans across the country, ESPN offers a contract extension to color analyst Joe Theismann.
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Instead of purchasing wrist watches to reward the play of his offensive linemen, Arizona Cardinals running back Edgerrin James buys out their contracts.
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Ben Roethlisberger is chosen as the cover model for Madden '08.
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Endorsement powerhouse John Madden agrees to suit up for a series of commercials promoting Under Armour. Mental images created by the press release launch a petition drive that kills the ads before they can be filmed.
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