Let's make this simple. Yo, Adam. Kick this one off. He booms it to the two-yard line. He Hate Me takes it, runs to the 20, gets blasted by Matt Chatham. Time runs out. Patriots are Super Bowl Champs. Like we said, simple.
Nice to see that this was the year that the eight-year run of that Game Before The Game foretelling the winning team in the Super Bowl came to an end.
Say it, Chris Berman: "That's…why they play the game!"
Okay, choose your caption:
Super Bowl Halftime Show was a real bust.
You had to be a real boob to enjoy that show.
Justin Timberlake was standing abreast of Janet.
Both performers barely know how to entertain.
If you think that deplorable scene was accidental, you probably also think that Tara Reid was a sweet, nice girl, one who Tom Brady couldn't wait to bring home and show Mom.
Put Bill Belichick in Canton.
And not five years after he retires. Now. Right now.
The day may be near when they may be comparing Joe Montana to Tom Brady.
Please tell me that we didn't see Troy Brown's last game as a Patriot on Sunday night.
What Panther defensive line?
Jeez. Jake Delhomme played his tail off. So much for those interceptions we all thought he was going to throw.
Deion Branch picked a terrific time to have the game of his life.
Ty Law proved something Sunday night, and proved it very clearly.
Zone coverage stinks.
Geek of the week: Everyone who did that wretched halftime show. Not just J & J. It just plain stunk. To all of you who remember U2 from two years ago, you have to agree.
Whatever subculture that halftime show appealed to, leave them the hell out of any future Super Bowls.
You think Bob Kraft was plastered when he accepted the Vince?
No. Woozy. Adam Vinatieri's newest miracle knocked him clean out of his chair.
Besides, if he had been on the sauce, his speech would have been longer and far more lucid.
Has the Patriot secondary been exposed?
Only the reserve safeties. They stink.
Remember Shawn Maier? He nearly cost the Patriots that shutout against Buffalo in the finale.
The Red Sox have found themselves a new third base coach: Bill Belichick.
Why? If someone needs to slide into third, tell Belichick to "start dancing" and it will work perfectly.
Wonder if Belichick ever listens to Leo Sayer? We're reminded of a tune of his called Long Tall Glasses and this guy who can't dance.
Early line on next year: Pats are 6-1 faves to repeat.
If the Super Bowl halftime show had been left up to Bob G:
Lead off with Mark Chestnut, singing Blame It On Texas.
Then come back with George Strait and All My Ex's Live In Texas.
And for the finale: the best C/W act on the planet, Alabama and If You're Gonna Play In Texas (You Gotta Have A Fiddle In The Band). Ooooh. With Jeff Cook on that fiddle, the whole stadium would be full of screams and yee-has.
Back to school: How do Tom Brady, Ty Law and Mike Vrabel get along when it's Michigan and Ohio State weekend?
Isn't it marvelous. Champs again, and the prevailing feeling is that the Patriots will be better next year.
Just breathe a sigh of relief when you see Rosevelt Colvin back in full swing next year.
Don't you hate any poll that goes like this: "Which Patriot is the most likely to not be back next year?"
And the answer "none of them" is not included.
Unfortunately, Antowain Smith would get my vote. Great three years, big fella.
If the Patriots ever did add a back that would finally replace Curtis Martin, ye Gods.
Oh, yeah. Curtis Martin. Patriots have won two Super Bowls since he left. How many has Martin won?
Aren't the Jets glad they mortgaged their future on Martin and Bill Parcells, yet it's the Patriots that have become the team of the 2000s?
Actually, we have Parcells to thank for two very important things.
Restoring respectability to this franchise.
Letting us have Belichick for only a first round draft pick.
Remember him: Former Raider Jack Squirek is, like Vrabel, a linebacker who knows what it's like to score a Super Bowl touchdown. But his was on an interception, not a reception. Big difference. But for Squirek, it was his fifteen minutes of fame in an otherwise totally unremarkable career.
Why are we not surprised to see Dan Marino quit that figurehead job the Dolphins offered him?
Darn. Now he'll be back at CBS. And Miami may make a run at Scott Pioli.
Well, they can try. Kraft will likely block that attempt like Richard Seymour blocks field goals.
End of another great season for Patriot Nation. Start that draft talk. When do batteries report to Fort Myers? When do the storm windows come down?
Just hurry up and get here, July. That's when the World Champion New England Patriots return for everyone to see.
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